penis:

The male-organ of copulation and urinary excretion, comprising a root , body or shaft , and globular extremity, or glans (penis). Contrary to a popular misconception among young American males, the penis is not a muscle that flexes into erection, nor is it a bone , especially not an air-inflatable/deflatable bone ; a boner is a misnomer. The penis consists principally of two long cylinders of spongy erectile tissue, the corpora cavernosa . An erection is caused by the pressure of blood trapped in those cylinders. During arousal, the nervous system rushes extra blood into the spongy tissue and the engorged cylinders expand compressing the walls of the veins that normally carry blood away. The average erect penis holds eight times as much blood as a flaccid one. The myth that a mans masculinity, virility or ability as a lover are in direct relation to the size of his penis still persists today. See penis for synonyms.

SEE ALSO: charactrornym; penis-sizes; personification .

QUOTES:

(1) Jonathan (Jack Nicholson) in Carnal Knowledge (1971) ' Women today are better hung than men! '

(2) Lady Claire Gurney (Coral Browne) to Jack, the lunatic 14th Earl of Gurney (Peter O'Toole) who believes he's God in The Ruling Class (1972): ' All right! If you're God reveal your godhead .' Jack immediately unzips his fly to prove it .

(3) Miles Monroe (Woody Allen), a man put to sleep in 1973 and awakened in 2173 is told by the doctors that the new order view him as an 'alien' and will adapt him to it in Sleeper (1973):
-- Miles: ' What do you mean destroyed?! '
-- Doctor: ' Your brain will be electronically simplified .'
-- Miles: ' My brain! It's my second favorite organ .'

(4) Babs (Martha Smith) masturbating Greg (James Daughton) in National Lampoon's Animal-House (1978): ' Greg, honey , is it supposed to be this soft? '

(5) Mary Wilke (Diane Keaton) to Isaac Davis (Woody Allen) in Manhattan (1979): ' My problem is I'm both attracted and repelled by the male-organ .'

(6) Mrs. Evelyn Kelcher (Barbara Harris) to Peggy Sue (Kathleen Turner) in Peggy Sue Got Married (1986): ' Peggy, do you know what a penis is? Stay away from it .'

(7) Laura/Laurette Voleur (Lea Thompson), an impostor posing as a French tutor , flirting with Uncle Jed (Jim Varney) in The Beverly Hillbillies (1993).
-- Laurette: ' Ha-penis is so hard to find .'
-- Uncle Jed: ' Excuse me!? '
-- Laurette: ' Ha-piness? '
-- Uncle Jed: ' Oh, happiness .'

(8) Sung by Eric Idle in Monty Python. The Meaning of Life (1983): ' Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis / Isn't it frightfully good to have-it-on / It's swell to have a stiffy / It's divine to own a dick / From the tiniest little tadger to the world's biggest prick / So, three cheers for your Willy or John-Thomas / Hooray for your one-eyed-trouser-snake / Your piece of pork , your wife's-best-friend , your passing or your cock / You can wrap it up in ribbons, you can stuff it in your sock / But don't take-it out in public or they'll stick you in the dock , and you won't come back .'

(9) Charles Panati. Sexy Origins and Intimate Things (1998): ' It is amazing how many slang words mean both 'penis' and 'fool': purz, dork , prick , dick , weenie . Perhaps it's because a horny man thinks with his penis rather than his brain .'

See Also: 10-Pounder, 17-ketosteroid, 3-4-2-5, 4-11-44, 59, 59ing, a bit of beef, a bit of hard for a bit of soft, a bit of snug for a bit of stiff, a bit of stiff, a piece of meat, a2m, Aaron's rod, abdominal protector, ablatio penis, abominable pants worm, Abraham, Abraham's bosom, acanthophallic, accessory urethral canal, accordion, accoutrements, Accu-Jac, ace, ace poker, aching for a side of beef, acorn, acorn-picker, acorns, active castration complex, acucullophallic, acucullophilia, acucullus, aculeophallic, Adam's dagger, Adam's whip, adamantine organon, Adams arsenal, agate, all forlorn, all meat, no potatoes, all penis bondage, all-beef sausage, allantotrioism, allsbay, almond, almond rock, almond rock candy, amblyopic organ, ampailang, ampallang, anaclisis, anaclitism, anaesthesia sexualis, anal play, anal sexual play, anal-genital intercourse, anaspadias, anatomically correct, angle, angle of the dangle, Anglican length, animated ivory, anteater, apadrayva, aphallate, apophallation, apparatus, apparatus urogenitalis, appendage, apples, appropriate member, apricots, arbor vitae, arm, arm of love, armored division, arrow, arse worm, arse-opener, arse-wedge, arsenal, arser, artificial penis, artillerie de Cupidon, artillerie de Venus, ass games, ass play, ass-opener, ass-to-mouth, ass-wedge, assisted shower, auger, autopederasty, autopedication, autosuck vagina, auxiliaries, awaken the bacon, axillary intercourse, axillism, baby beef, baby-grinder, baby-maker, babys arm, babys forearm, Bacchus march, back wheels, bacon, bacon bazooka, badger, bag of fruits, bag of tricks, bag-filler, bagadga, baggage, baggage-boy, baggette, bagpipe, bagpipes, bagpiping, bake potatoes, balanitis, balano-, balanotage, bald eagle, bald man, bald-headed candidate, bald-headed hermit, bald-headed mouse, bald-headed rat, Balkans, the, ball bag, ball basket, ball sack, Ballarat, balling the jack, ballock bag, ballocks, balls and bat, baloney, baloney pony, bamboo stick, banana, banana skin, bananas and cream, band-member, banger, bangers, bangles, banjo string, bannocks, bar, bar on, barge pole, bash the bishop, basketful of meat, bat, bat and balls, bat boy, bat up, bat-foul, baton, batter, battering piece, battering ram, battlefat, bauble, baubles, bayonet, baz, bazooka, bazooka shooter, BD drill, beak, bean, bean pods, bean pole, bean-shooter, bean-tosser, beard-splitter, beat with the ugly stick, beating (someone) with the ugly stick, beating tool, beaver cleaver, beaver lever, bed flute, bee stings, Beecham's pills, beef, beef bayo with extra mayo, beef bayonet, beef in the can, beef jerky, beef stick, beef whistle, beer can, bell, bell cheese, bell polishing, bell-end (of the penis), bell-knobbed, bell-rope, bell-swagged, belly bristles, belly rub, belly ruffian, belly thicket, belly whiskers, belly-fuck, belly-fucker, belly-queen, belly-to-belly, belongings, below the navel, belt buster, bend a pipe on the pisser, bent dick, bent stick, berries, best friend, best leg of three, best part, Bethlehem Steel, between you and me is the bed post, bicho, big bamboo, Big Ben, big bird, big bite, big brother, big conk, big cock, big daddy, big dipper, Big feet, big meat, big fella, the, Big Foot Joe, big head, big hug, big hunk of meat, Big Jim and the twins, Big nose, big hose, big one, big piece of meat, big red, big wand, Bihari procedure, bilbo, billiards, billy, billy and doo, billy club, binding, bingey, bio boy, biological male, biological reaction, biological response, bird, bird's eggs, bishop, bishop's miter, bit of beef, bit of hard, bit of hard for a bit of soft, bit of snug for a bit of stiff, bit of stiff, biteful, bits, black jack, black limo, black pencil, black snake, blackjack, blackleg, blade, blanket stiff, blennorrhagia, blind, blind as a boiled turnip, Blind Bob, blind buckler, blind meat, blind piece, blinds, blood-breaker, blow job, blow pop, blow stick, blowtorch, bludgeon, blue jay, blue steeler, blue thimble, blue vein, blue veiner, blue-veined custard chucker, blue-veined junket hooligan, blue-veined junket pump, blue-veined piccolo, blue-veined steak, blue-veined throbber, blue-veined trumpet, Bluebeard, Bluebeard's closet, blunt end, boasin tone, bob-tail, bobbles, bobby's helmet, bobbys anorak, bobstay, bobtail, bodkin, body worship, body's captain, bogga, boinng, bollock bag, bollocks, bombhead, bonbons, bone, bone in the leg, bone phone, bone-on, bone-up, boneless appendage (of the male), boneless fish, boneless stiff, boner, boneroni, bonfire, bonk-on, booboos, bookends, bore, boss and his two helpers, botuliform genital pendant of the male, bow, bowsprit, box, box the compass, boy, boy toy, bozack, branch, brandle, brat-getter, break a lance with, break a peter on, break and enter, bring down (by hand), bring up by hand, bristle up, broom handle, broomstick, Brown Joe, bruiser, bubbly jack, bubbly jock, bucking bronco, buddy, buffing stick, bug-fucker, bugle, bulb of the vestibule, bulge, bull point, bull's eye, bullets, bullish, bulp, bum balls, bum tickler, bun puncher, bun spreader, bung, burrito, bury the hatchet where it won't rust, bury the wick, bush, bush beater, bush whacker, buster, bustle pinching, butcher, butt basher, butt smasher, butterfinger, butterfly board, buttock jig, button, button buster, button mushroom, button-short, buttonhole worker, BVH, cacophallic, cafe curtains, calliphallic, calliphallus, camel complaint, Canadian bacon, canary, candle, candy, candy cane, candy stick, cane, cannon, capricornus, captain, Captain Hard, Captain Hightop the Love Commander, Captain Hogseye, Captain One-Eye, Captain Picard, Captain Standish, captive penis, carezza, carnal member, carnal part, carnal parts, carnal stump, carrot, carry a big stick, cartes, carts, cartso, cartzo, Casey, castrato, catatasis, catso, cavalier, cavity probe, change purse, chanticleer, charger, Charles the Bald, charleys, charlies, chaud, cheese ridge, cheesey bunnet, cheesy bell-end, cheesy wheelbarrow, chemise cagoule, cherry birch, cherry picker, cherry splitter, chestnuts, chew, chew it, chibi, chick with dick, chicken mc nuggets, chicken neck, chicken-choker, chicken-with-a-basket, child-getter, chimney-stopper, chingus, chink-stopper, choad, choker, chones, chooza, chopped cock, chopper, chora, chota, Chris Hardwick, Christ and two apostles, christener, Christine Jorgensen, Christmas crackers, chub, chubby, chuckies, chull, chum, chunky monkey, chutney ferret, cinnamon stick, circumcised, clappers, clava, clean the pipe(s), cleat, clipped dick, clitoris, clitoropenis, clothes pegs, clothes pin, clothespeg, clothespin, clothespin torture, club, club foot, clubbed foot, cluster, cobbler's awls, cobbler's stall, cobblers, cobbs, cobra, cobs, cock, cock and ball bondage, cock and ball harness, cock bath, cock block, cock cheese, cock corpsman, cock harness, cock mouth gag, cock of death, cock strap, cock torture, cock your shotgun, cock-a-fanny, cock-on, cock-rot, cock-stand, cockaroony, cocked, cocked gun, cockhead, cockhead cheese, cockknuckle, cockles, cockoroony, cockring, cockroach, cocksmith, cocktus erectus, cockwhip, cocky, coconuts, codpiece, cods, coffee stalls, coitus, coitus in anum, coitus in axilla, coitus interruptus, coitus obstructus, coitus per anum, coitus per rectum, coitus profundus, coitus saxonicus, coitus vadosus, cojones, cold meat, cold pig, Colleen Bawn, college fuck, college style, collement, colobosis, colpectasia, colpochoresis, come aloft, come factories, command module, Compass of the Netherland, concern, concrete donkey, condom, condomless, conkers, contrapunctum, cookies, coolies, cop a doodle, copper stick, copulate, coral branch, corker, corn beef cudgel, corona glandis, coronal extender, coronal sulcus, corpuscle, Corsican, cory, coupler, coupling bat, courting cream, crab ladder, crack a fat (one), crack hunter, crack run, crackerjacks, cracking, cracking tool, cracksman, crank, crankshaft, cranny hunter, cream crackers, cream-stick, credentials, cremorne, crimson chitterling, crimson crowbar, crook, croopy, crotch, crotch cartilage, crotch cobra, crotch rocket, crowbar, crowd pleaser, crown, crown jewels, crud, crumpet-trumpet, crura, crus, crus penis, cuckoo, cucumber, cullions, culls, culty-gun, cum factories, cum slinger, cunny-catcher, cunt stretcher, cunt-stabber, cunt-stand, cunt-sticker, cunt-stirrer, Cupid's torch, cure the blind, cure the horn, curlies, curls, curly hairs, curtains, custard, custard cannon, custard-chucker, custom-house, cutlass, cuts, Cyclops, daddy bag, daddy longdick, daddy mack, dagger, daisy chain, damsons, dang, dangers, dangle, dangle-dong, dangle-parade, dangler, danglers, dangling participle, dangling participles, dart (of love), dawn horn, dead infertile, dead lizard, dead meat, dead rabbit, dead soldier, dead stick, dead worm, deadwood, dear morsel, dearest member, decoy(er), decunt, deep-throat, delicate glutton, delight of women, deliver a baby, delivering the wood, derrick, Detane, detumescence, detumescence of the penis, devil, dew off the lily, dew on the lily, diamond cutter, diamonds, diapiresalgia, dibble, dibucaine hydrochloride, dick, dick butkiss, dick butter, dick doc, dick someone, dick up, dick wheat, dick-tator, dickery-dock, Dickey, Dickie and the boys, dickory-dock, Dicky, dicky broad, dicky dunk, diddly pout, diddly-whacker, digitis erectus, dildo, dill, Dill Doll, dilly with the willy, dilly-whacker, dimple-dick, ding, ding-a-ling, ding-dangs, ding-dong, ding-dongs, dingbat, dinghy, dingle, dingle-dangle, dingo, dingus, dingy, dink, dinosaur, dipstick, dirk, dirty barrel, discharge, distillate of love, distillatia, divining rod, do-dads, do-funny, do-hickies, do-jigger, do-johnny, dobber, docking, Doctor Cocker, Doctor Johnson, dodads, dog, dog clutch, dog in a blanket, dog-knotted, dog-locked, dohickey, dohickeys, dohickie, dohickies, dohinger, dojigger, dojiggers, dojohnnie, dollar-an-inch man, dolly, dolphin, donaker, dong, dong and gongs, donger, donkey dick, donkey-, donkey-dicked, donkey-rigged, donkified, donniker, donut holder, doodad, doodads, doodle, doodle sack, doodle-case, doohicky, doover, doowhackey, dopper, dork, dorsal, dot, dot the I, double event, down below, down there, down-leg, DP, drain pipe, drape queen, draped, drapes, draw the drapes, dress to the right (or to the left), dribble-cock, dribbledick, drill, drink on a stick, dripper, dripsy, drive, driving post, drooper, drooping member, droopy, drop on it, dropping member, drumstick, ducky-bird, dumb glutton, dummy, dunkie, dust cover for the cunt, dusters, dydus, dyspareunia, eager pleaser, eel, eenob, eggs (in the basket), eggwhite cannon, Eight Wonder of the World, The, ejac vac, ejaculatio ante portas, eleventh finger, Elmer Pudd, emasculation, end, enemy, engine of love, English method, English sentry, enob, erected spermapositor, erectile urogenital appendage, erectio penis, erection maintainer, erection medicine, erectivation, Eric Shun, essentials, everlasting gobstopper, external urinary meatus, extra digit, extra skin, eye dropper, eye of the Bishop, the, eye-hole, eye-opener, face fucking, face job, face pussy, facial, factory equipped, faggots toothbrush, fags toothbrush, fake penis, family jewels, family organ, fancy lip-service, fancy work, fanny ferret, Fat Frank, Fat Injection, fat one, fat peter, father-of-all, feel my pulse, fellate, fellatio, fellation, fellator, fellatorism, fellatrice, fellatrix, female reproductive organs, ferret, fiddle bow, fiddle-stick, fiddling stick, fifty-nine, fifty-nining, fig, figs, finger job, finger puppet, firm worm, first leg of three, fish stick, five against one, fixed bayonet, flaccid, flack, flag, flagpole, flange, flap-doodle, flapper, flat fuck, flesh pencil, flip-flap, flog the bishop, flog the donkey, flounder, flowers and frolics, flute, foaming at the mouth, foaming beef probe, fool-sticker, foot long, forbidden zone, foreman, foreskin, fornicating engine, fornicating member, fornicating tool, fornicator, fountain pen, fraenum (of the penis), frankendick, Fred, Frencher, Frenching, frenulum, frenulum of the penis, frenulum preputii, frenum (of the penis), frick, frigamajig, front porch, fruit for the monkey, fuck in the teeth, fuck muscle, fuck pole, fuck udders, fuck-meat, fuck-rod, fuck-stick, fucker, fucking stick, fucking tool, fud packer, Full lips, fill lips, fun and frolics, fun bone, fun-stick, fun-zone, funk stick, funmaker, G-string, gadget, gadgets, gadso, galloping knob rot, gap-stopper, gardener, gargantuan organum virile, gargle it, gator, gay house, gay in the legs, gaying instrument, gear, gear and tool, gearbox, gearstick, gearstick d'amour, General smuts, generating tool, generation tool, generative organ, genetic male, genital coupler, genital forefoot, genital organs, genital pound of flesh, genital reamer, genital shaft, genital staff, genital tentacle, genitalia, genitals, gentle fist, gentle tittler, gentleman, gentleman's appendage, German helmet, get a leaky faucet, get a stand, get down on one's knees, get Jack in the orchard, gherkin, gifted, giggle stick, giggling pin, gingambobs, girl catcher, girlometer, give a bit of hard for a bit of soft, give a bit of snug for a bit of stiff, give face, give mutton for beef, glands, glans, glans penis, globes, glory hole, glory pole, gloryhole, glow rod, glow stick, gnarled root of love, gnat meat, goat, goatees, goatskin, gobble the worm, gobstopper, Gods revenge on a woman, going blind, golden rivet, gonad, gones, gongs, gonicles, gonorrhea, goober, good foot, good time, goolies, goose's neck, gooseberries, gooser, goot, gooter, gorilla salad, goy toy, grand bag, gravy-giver, gravy-maker, grew proud below the navel, grinding tool, gristle, gristle-gripper, gristle-stick, groceries, groin, guided missile, gully-raker, gun, gut-reamer, gut-stick, gut-stretcher, gynepiresalgia, hacker, hair divider, hair splitter, hair-job, hairless wonder, hairy banana, hairy conkers, hairy saddlebags, hairy sausage, half a cob, half-mast, halve the crack, ham and two eggs, ham howitzer, hambone, Hamilton Wick, hammer, hammering, Hampton Wick, hand ball, hand-made, hand-raised, hand-reared, hand-staff, handle, handmade, handstaff, hang-down, hangers, Hanging Johnny, happy sack, hard head, hard salami, hard-bit, hard-on, hard-up, hardcore pornography, hardened spermapositor, Hardhat Harry, hardware, harpoon, hat rack, have a bent dick, have a bone-on, have a boner, have a hard-on, have a horn, have a pash on, having it on, he-blow, he-thing, he/she, head, heat in the meat, heat seeking missile, heirlooms, hell, helmet, helmet pelmet, Henry Halls, Herman the One-eyed German, hermit, hickey, hidden treasure, hidden tumor, higgumbobs, his lordship, His Majesty in purple cap, hissing Sid, ho-handle, hock, hodge dog, hoe-handle, hog, hogger, hole it, hole puncher, holiday money, holy poker, holy pole, hone, honker, honorable prick, hood, hooded, hoover, hop up and down, hopping bug, horn, horn-colic, hornification, horny, horse's handbrake, hose, hose job, hot dog, hot in the tail, hot member, hot rod, hotchee, huffle, huffling, hugen, hum job, human enema, human reproductive organs, hummer, humpmobile, hung, hung like a bull, hung like a dinosaur, hung like a horse, hung like a rabbit, hung like a stallion, hunk of meat, husbandman of nature, IBM, ice cream machine, ID, idol, immissio penis, impale, impotence, impotency, in full fig, in full orchestra, in gear, in one's Sunday best, in one's Sunday clothes, in the box, in to the hilt, inch, inch instrument, indurated male underbelly, infibulation, ingressability, ink in the pen, insertor, instrument, instrumentum erectum, interstitial glands, intimate bits, intimate parts, introduce Charlie, introduce the captain, introduce the captain to his pie, intromission, intromittent organ, invirility, Irish horse, Irish rise, Irish root, Irish toothache, Irish toothpick, iron, irrumatio, irrumation, itcher, ithy, ithyphallophobia, jab, jack, Jack in the box, jack the beanstalk, jackalope, jacket, jackhammer, Jackson Pollocks, jacktool, Jacob's ladder, jakey, jammy, jang, jap's eye, jawbreaker, jean tent, jelly bag, jellyroll, jenny, jerk the mutton, jerking iron, Jew's compliment, jewel, jewel box, jewelry, jewelry showcase, jewels, Jewish by hospitalization, Jewish by operation, Jewish compliment, Jewish corned beef, Jewish national, Jewish nightcap, Jews lance, Jezebel, jig, jig-jag, jig-jigger, jigger, jigging bone, jiggle bone, jiggling bone, Jim Dog, Jimbo, jimbrowsky, jimmy, jing-jang, jingleberries, jizz jemmy, jizzbags, jock, jockey, jockum, John Thomas, John Thursday, John Tom, John Willie, Johnny Rollocks, johnny-come-lately, johnson, joint, jointess, jolly member, Jolly Red Giant, jolly roger, jolly stick, Jorgensen, joy knob, joy prong, joy stick, joyknob, joystick, juice the fruit, Julius Caesar, jumbucks, jump off/out at..., jungle meat, jungleberries, junior, kaks, kanakas, karezza, kazoo, kelks, Ken Dodds, key, key to heaven, keyhole, kickapoo, kidney wiper, kielbasa, King Kong Dong, king's iron, king-member, kit, knackers, knacks, knick-knacks, knitting needle, knob, knob cheese, knob sack, knob-ache, knobble, knobster, knock, knocker, knockers, knot, kosher dill, kosher meat, kosher pickle, kowtow chow, krud, lace, lace curtains, lad, the, ladies' delight, ladies' lollipop, ladies' plaything, ladies' treasure, lady-ware, lame duck, lamp of life, lance in rest, lance of love, langer, lanoola, Lazarus, lead in your pencil, leather, leather cigar, leather dresser, Leather Lane, leather stretcher, length, levator vaginae, lever, libido bandido, lick a prick, licorice stick, life preserver, lift-up, limbless erast, limp-dick, limp-prick, lingam, link-sausage, lipstick, lithoid phallus, little acorns, little brother, Little Buddy, Little Buddys buddies, Little Dick, Little Dickie, little dipper, Little Elvis, little engine, little finger, little friend, little head, little man, Little Peter, little pinkie, little sliver of flesh, little tongue sushi, Little Willy, live wire, liver turner, lizard, load, loaded gun, lob, lob cock, lob prick, lock, lock of locks, log, loins, lollipop, lollypop, long dong, Long Dong Silver, long pole, long pork, long trade, long-arm inspection, longfellow, longhorn, lop cock, lose the last round, louisville slugger, love apples, love bone, love custard, love dart, love gun, love handle, love length, love machine, love meat, love muscle, love pump, love sausage, love scepter, love spuds, love stick, love tool, love torpedo, love trumpet, love truncheon, love's pick-lock, love-rod, love-wand, loves battering ram, loves dribbling dart, loves engine, loves sensitive truncheon, low neck, low neck and short sleeves, low-hangers, lower male proboscis, luggage, lunch box, lunchbox, lung disturber, lust bone, lust shaft, lust sword, machine (of love), machinery, nuts and bolts, macrogenitalism, macropenis, macrophallia, macrophallus, Mad Mick, maggot, magic wand, magnum, main vein, Majesty in Purple Cap, His, Major Woody, make a bald man cry, make a milkshake, make the blind see, male begetting organ, male cleaver, male condom, male genital appendage, male genital club, male genital dispenser, male genital probe, male genital teat, male gladiolus, male infibulation, male insinuator, male interfemoral infidel, male intruder, male knout, male mandrel, male member, male membrum erectum, male monolith, male netherland(s), male organ, male organ of generation, male organ of reproduction, male organon, male organs of generation, male organs of reproduction, male pendant, male poker, male pouch, male pound of flesh, male pudendal trifler, male pudendum, male reproductive organs, male satisfier, male sex(ual) organ, male sexual organon, male sinker, male urogenitial horn, maleness, mallet, mamon, man mountain, man muscle, man root, man steel, man's best leg of three, man's privities, man's third leg, man-bone, man-meat, manbone, manhood, manliness, manmeat, manroot, marabon stork, marble halls, marbles, maritudinal erection, Marquis of Lorne, marriage gear, marrons, marrow-bone, marshmallows, maschalation, masculine part, master member, master of ceremonies, master tool, masterpiece, material part, mating meat, mating tool, matrimonial peace-maker, Max Walls, maypole, means of generation, meat, meat and (two) potatoes, meat and two veg, meat and two vegetables, meat axe, meat cleaver, meat dagger, meat flute, meat for the butcher, meat for the poor, meat puppet, meat whistle, meat-seeking pissile, meatus, meatus longus, meatus urinarius, meaty bites, mechanic, medolingus, medorthophobia, meggs, member, Member for Cockshire, membrum virile, membrum virile erectum, membrum virile flaccidum, mentula, mentulalgia, merrymaker, Mickey, middle finger, middle leg, middle stump, mighty meat, milk, milk bone, milking pail, milkman, millimeter-peter, minus a pinus, missile, missile of Venus launched, Mister Fuzzy, Mister Happy, Mister Poky, Mister Softy, Mister Wiggly, modigger, moisture missile, mole, mommy-daddy button, monkey, morning hard-on, morning pride, morning wood, mortar, most precious part(s), mouse, mouth job, moving parts, Mr. Big, Mr. Bluevein, Mr. Friendly, Mr. Priapus, Mr. Torpedo, Mr. Wong, muff missile, muscle (of love), mushroom tip, mushroom-rigged, mushroom-tipped, mutinous rogue, mutton, mutton dagger, mutton gun, mutton musket, my body's captain, nackers, nad bag, nad sack, nadds, nadgers, nads, nag, naggy, nags, nameless thing, nards, nasty bits, natural member, natural parts, natural places, naturals, nature's scythe, naughty bits, naughty toy, nearsighted, Nebuchadnezzar, necessaries, needle, needle-dick, nervous cane, nether parts, nether proboscis, nether regions, Niagara Falls, nick-nacks, night stick, nightcrawler, nimrod, nine iron, nippy, nob, nobby halls, noodle, nookey, nooky, noose, nose to hose, nothin cock, nothing, nothing cock, nubbin, nudger, nuggets, nutmegs, nutrageous, nuts and bolts, nutty buddy, O.P.P., oak tree, obelisk, off, okra and prunes, Old Adam, old baldy, old blind Bob, old crank case, Old Damocles, old faceful, Old Faithful, Old Faithless, old goat-peter, Old Hornington, Old Horny, old man, old one-eye, Old Slimy, old warty cod, olisbos, Omar the tentmaker, on the bonk, on the honk, on the stand, onanism, one's person, one-eye(d), one-eyed Bob, one-eyed brother, one-eyed demon, one-eyed monk, one-eyed monster, one-eyed pants mouse, one-eyed snake, one-eyed trouser snake, one-eyed whale, one-eyed wonder, one-eyed wonder worm, one-eyed worm, one-eyed zipper snake, onion skin, orchestra stalls, orchids, organ, organ of generation, organ of reproduction, organs of generation, organs of reproduction, organs of the reproductive system, organum virile, organum virile durum, organum virile erectum, ornaments, oscar, Oscar Meyer, P-maker, package, packing heat, packs a ton, he, packs a wallop, he, pan handle, pant plaything, pantilever, pants philistine, pants python, pants worm, paradise strokes, parts below, parts of generation, parts of reproduction, passion pole, passion stick, Pat and Mick, pax wax, peacemaker, pearl diver, pebbles, pecker, pecker wood, pecnoster, peculator pecker, peculiar member, peculiar members, Pedro, pee-dee, pee-hole, pee-pee, pee-pee hole, pee-wee, peel one's best end in, peenie, peep, peepee, peepee hole, peeper, peezel, peg, pego, pen, penal dick, pencil, pencil and tassel, pencil dick, pendulum, penial, penicillus, penie, penile, penile braggart, penile detumescence, penile erection, penile-vaginal, penilingism, penilingus, penis, penis captivus, penis envy, penis equivalent, penis femineus, penis glans, penis immensus, penis in erectus, penis infibulation, penis length, penis machinist, penis mouthus, penis muliebris, penis size, penis substitue, penis worship, 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pipe, piss fat, piss handle, piss hard, piss hard-on, piss proud, piss-pipe, pisser, pissworm, pistol, piston, piston job, piston rod, pit job, pitch a tent, pitching a tent in one's shorts, PIV, pixie stick, pizzle, pizzler, placket-racket, plate, plate of ham, play pocket pool, play the bones, playing pocket pool, plaything, plonker, plug, plug-tail, plums, plunger, pocket billiards, pocket fisherman, pocket pinball, pocket polka, pocket pool, pocket waltz, pogo-stick, point, pointer, poke, poker, pole, pole hole, pole-climber, polish the knob, Polyphemus, pood, poontanger, pooper, pop it in, poperin pear, popsicle, popsicle stick, popular body parts, pork, pork dagger, pork enema, pork sword, porridge gun, portable pocket rocket, potato finger, potent regiment, pouch, poud, pound, pounders, prack, prairie oysters, pre-cum, precheck, prepuce, press the button, priapus, prick, prick-lick, prick-pride, prick-proud, prick-purse, prick-stand, prickholder, prickle, pride and joy, pride-of-the-morning, prides, prigpas, primary syphilis, prime it, Prince Everhard of the Netherlands, Principal Skinner, princock, private property, privates, privities, privy limb, privy limbs, Privy Member, privy members, privy parts, probe, prod, prong, pronger, proud below the navel, proud inclination of the flesh, prunes, pry open, pubes, pubickers, pud, pudding, pudendal intruder, pudendal trifler, pudendus, pull out, pull some lumber, pulling out, pump, pump action mottgun, pump handle, puncture, punisher, the, puny prick, pup, puppy, purple lollipop, purple throbber, purple-headed avenger, purple-headed custard chucker, purple-headed love truncheon, purple-headed meat puppet, purple-headed monster, purple-headed warrior, purple-helmeted yogurt thrower, purple-veined tonsil-tickler, purse, pus-rod, pushing box, pussy diver, pussy feeder, pussy fodder, pussy pleaser, pussy plunger, pussy-fucker, pussy-poker, pussy-sticker, put it in, put it in and break it, putter, putz, pylon, pyrie, python, quickening peg, quiff-splitter, quim-stake, quim-stick, quim-sticker, quim-wedge, rabbit, radish, raise a gallop, raisin bag, raising Lazarus from the dead, ram charger, rammer, ramming, ramrod, randy, ranger, rantallion, rat, raw meat, ready to spit, reamer, rear entry, Rector of the Females, red cap, red hot poker, red lobster, redcap, reproductive organs, Richard, ride a blind piece, rifle, rig, rigid digit, rise in the Levis, rise, a, roaring horn, roaring jack, rock formation, rock python, rocket, rocks, rod, rod of love, rod-on, rodger, Rodney, roger, Roger the Lodger, rollies, rolling pin, rollocks, roly-poly, Roman candle, rooster, root, rooting, rosy red reproductive rod, roto-rooter, roundhead, royal jewels, rub bellies, rub freak, rub the radish, rub-belly, rubber, rubigo, rudder, rude bits, rude parts, ruffian, rule of three, rump-splitter, runcible, Rupert, sack, sack o' nuts, salami, salty dog, salty yogurt slinger, Sandra Bullocks, sausage, scalloped potatoes, schlong, schmeegle, schmekel, schmuck, schnitzel, schwantz, schwanz, Schwanzesser, schwing, scooby snack, scope, scorf up on a bod, scorz, screwdriver, scrot, scrot sack, scrote, scurvy end, seals, secret parts, secret works, secrets, semen shooter, Senator Packwood, sensitive plant, sensitive truncheon, serpent, sex and reproductive organs, sex bone, sex glands, sex meat, sex organon, sex organs, sex stalk, sexing piece, sexocet missile, sexual intercourse, sexual organon, sexual organs, sexual trocar of the male, shaft, shaft of Cupid, shaft of delight, shake, shake the dew off the lily, shake the peg, sheath, shit stabber, shit stick, shlong, shmendrik, shmok, shmuck, shooting iron, shooting stick, short and curlies, short arm, short hairs, short leg, short sleeves, short strokes, short-arm inspection, shove-straight, shrimp, shriveller, shtick, side-by-side position, silent flute, silky appendage, silver penny, sinbad, sink the sailor, sink the sausage, sink the soldier, siphnianize, size-ist, skewer, ski up and down Happy Valley, skin boy, skin flute, skin the banana, skin the weinie, skinclad tube, skinning, Skinny rubbing, slabs, sleeping bag, sleeping beauty, slime, slip a length, slip her a length, slip into, slip one a hot beef injection, slug, slurpee, small arm, small person, smentana, snake, Snaky-Lick Trick, snapper, snatch pointer, snorker, snotty, softy, solicitor general, the, southern hemisphere, southern love, Spanish fly, spear, sperm sack, spermapositor, spike, spike-faggot, spiked phallus, spinach queen, spindle, spit, spit-fuck, spitfire, spitter, spitting cobra, split-mutton, sponge off the dust, spooge gun, sporran, sporting some wood, spout, spread, spunk factories, spunk holders, Spunky, spurm gun, stab, stacked, staff, stag, stalk, stand, stand-on, standard, standing, standing member, stanley, star-gazer, stargazer, steak, steel beam, Steely Dan, stem, stemmer, stick, stick and bangers, stick it in, sticker, stickshift, sticky finger, sticky spud gun, stiff, stiff deity, stiff one, stiff peter, stiff prick, stiff stander, stiff-and-stout, stiff-on, stiffy, sting, stinger, stocking stuffer, stones, stonk, stonk-on, stonker, stork, Stormy Dick, stout warrior, strap, stretcher, string and nuggets, stud, stud meat, stuffy, stump, Stumpy, suck off, suck-and-swallow, sugar stick, Sunday best, Sunday clothes, superdick, swab the tonsils, swack, swallow the pipe, swanska, sweet meat, sweets, swelling, swingers, swizzle stick, sword, sword swallower, swordsman, tackle, tadge, tadger, tadpole carrier, tail, tail box, tail gone to seed, tail high, tail over the dashboard, tail pike, tail pin, tail tackle, tail-line, take down (by hand), take the meat out, take the starch out of, tallywag(ger), tallywags, tallywhacker, tame the bald-headed mouse, tan-trouser(ed) snake, tannhauser, tar brush, tardagen, target, tarn wags, tarrywags, tarse, Tarzan chord, tarzoon, tassel, taters, tatties, teapot, tear in the eye, tear in the lily, teenie-weenie, teeny-weeny, temporary priapism, tenant-in-tail, tender tumour, tent, tent peg, tent pole, teratophallia, teratophallic, teretophallic, terror of virgins, testicular sac, testimonials, testosities, Texan, Texas longhorn, thing, thing-a-ling, thingamabobs, thingamajigs, thingamaling, thingie, thingmajigs, thingumbobs, thingummies, thingummy, thingy, third leg, thistle, Thomas, thorn (in the flesh), three card trick, three-inch fool, three-legged beaver, three-piece set, three-piece suit, throb knob, throbbing member, throbbing muscle of pure love, throbbing python (of love), thrum, thrumster, thumb, thumb of love, thumper, thyrsos, tickle faggot, tickle-gizzard, tickle-tail, tickle-toby, tickler, tiddelly pod, tiki-tiki, tilt on one's kilt, timothy, tip, tired-rabbit, tit-bit, tit-bits, tittle-bat, titty-oggy, todger, Tom Doolies, Tom Thumb, tom-tom, tommy, tommy buster, Tommy Rollicks, Tommy Rollocks, tong, tongue sushi, tonk, tonsil wrench, toobsnake, toobsteak, tool, tool bag, tool box, tool of pleasure, toolbox, toot meat, tooth somebody to death, toothache, tootsie roll, torch of Cupid, tosh, tossergash, touch dick, touch-on, touch-trap, touche pipi, towel rack, toy, transurethal resection of the prostate, transurethral prostatectomy, trap stick, tree of life, tree of love, tref, trichomoniasis, Tricky Dicky, trifle, trigger, trombone, tromboning, trouser ferret, trouser mauser, trouser snake, trouser tent, trouser toy, trouser trick, trouser trout, trouser trumpet, trouser truncheon, trouser worm, trout, trumpet, truncheon, trypan, tube of meat, tube-steak, tube-steak of love, tug muscle, tumefied phallus, tumescence, tumescent, tummy banana, tummy-fuck, tummy-tickler, turgid bayonet, turkey baster, turkey neck, turnip, TURP, turtleneck sweater, twanger, tweeterfrank, twiddle-diddler, twiddle-diddles, twig, twig and berries, twins, the, two dots and a dash, ugly little dog Dick, unbutton the mutton, uncircumcised, uncle, Uncle Dick, Uncle Jim and the twins (at attention), under par, undercarriage, underpant eel, underparts, unemployed, the, unit, unmentionables, unruly member, unsliced bologna, up, up a bone, up-pointed male spike, upright grand, upscope, Urals, The, urethra, urethral orifice, urinary petcock, urinator, urogenital tailpiece, useless, the, vagina dentata, vaginal dilator, vaginal orgasm, vegetable stick, vein laden meatpipe, veiney bang stick, veiny salami, velvet orbs, Venetian blinds, verge, vestibulovaginal bulb, vibrating masturbator, vinegar strokes, VIP, virgins dream, virile member, virile reflex, virilia, virilingus, vitals, vomer, voorsch, wacker, wad, wag, wake up with Jake up, waking the dead, walking tripod, wammer, wand, wand of love, Wanda Wandwaver, wang, wang bone, wang-tang, wangdoodle, wanger, wank stick, wank tanks, wanker, wankrod, wares, warm member, warm-up, watch and seals, water box, water engine, water pistol, water spout, water worker, water works, Watering the Oak Tree, waterworks, wave, wazoo, wazzock, weapon, wedding kit, wedding tackle, wedge, wedge bone, wee, wee-man, wee-wee, weener, weenie, weight training, weiner, weinie, well-endowed, well-equipped, well-furnished, well-hung, well-knobbed, well-loaded, welt, Wentworth Falls, wet noodle, wet spaghetti, whacker, whalebone, whammer, whang, whang bone, whangdoodle, whanger, whanker, whatchamacallit, whatsis, whatsit, whatsus, whatzis, wheel it out, wheezer, whip, whip it out, whip whistle, whirlygigs, whisker splitter, whiskey dick, whistle, white owl, whoopie stick, whopper, whore-pipe, wick, Wicked Willie, wiener, wienie, wienie wagger, wife's best friend, wigga-wagga, wild rogue, Wilde Oscar, willie, willy the burping worm, wimpy dick, wingdoodle, wink, winkie, winkie wankie woo, winkle, winky, winky bag, winny-popper, wire, wishbone, with his tail high, withdrawal method, witnesses to ones virility, wobbly bits, woman-on-top position, womb broom, womb bruiser, womb brush, womb cannon, womb ferret, women pleaser, won ton, wong, wonger, wonk, wood, Woodrow, woody, Woody Johnson, woofer, wooter, wop, worm, worm with a nazi helmet, wriggling pole, wriggling stick, wrinkled dick, wurst, yack, yang, yang fella, yarbles, yard, yardage, yards of personality, Yasser, Yasser Crackafat, ying-yang, yogurt rifle, yongles, yosh, yoyo, yum-yum, yummies, yutz, zab, zack, zip it out, zipperfish, zoob, zoobrick, zubb, zubrick, zucchini

Quotes Containing penis:
Ford Fairlane (Andrew Dice Clay) in The Adventures of Ford Fairlane (1990): 'What's the definition of a vagina? The box a penis comes in.'
Ford Fairlane (Andrew Dice Clay) talking about Stanley (his penis) in The Adventures of Ford Fairlane (1991): ''He normally gets up half an hour before I do .''
Jane (Susan Sarandon) on penis-sizes in The Witches of Eastwick (1987): ''I prefer small. I do . Aesthetically, I prefer small. Sam was huge and there were times when I just could not face it .''
Officer Davis (Phil Hartman) in National Lampoon''s Loaded Weapon 1 (1993): ''Why did the guy give a name to his penis? He didn''t want a stranger making most of his decisions.''
Larry Lipton (Woody Allen) in Manhattan Murder Mystery (1993): ''I''d fix Ted up with Helen Dubin, but they''d probably get-into an argument over penis-envy ; the poor guy suffers from it so.''
Annie (Diane Keaton) relating her conversation with her analyst to Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) in Annie Hall (1977) - Annie:''Then she mentioned penis-envy . Do you know about that?'' - Alvy: ''Me?! I''m one of the few males who suffer from that.''
Zelig (Woody Allen), the human chameleon, in Zelig (1983):''I worked with Freud in Vienna. We broke the concept of penis-envy . Freud felt it should be limited to women.''
Jane (Susan Sarandon) on penis-sizes in The Witches of Eastwick (1987): ''I prefer small. I do . Aesthetically, I prefer small. Sam was huge and there were times when I just could not face it .''
Officer Davis (Phil Hartman) in National Lampoon''s Loaded Weapon 1 (1993): ''Why did the guy give a name to his penis? He didn''t want a stranger making most of his decisions.''
That Sam is so thoughtful. He promised to slip me an extra tube steak .' An naive, unsuspecting Alice (Henriette Mantel) in A Very Brady Sequel (1996). Tube steak is slang for penis .
Jane (Susan Sarandon) on penis-sizes in The Witches of Eastwick (1987): ''I prefer small. I do . Aesthetically, I prefer small. Sam was huge and there were times when I just could not face it .''
Ford Fairlane (Andrew Dice Clay) in The Adventures of Ford Fairlane (1990): ''What''s the definition of a vagina? The box a penis comes in.''
William Shakespeare. Alls Well that Ends Well: ''He wears his honour in a box-unseen / That hugs his kicky-wicky [penis] here at home / Spending his manly marrow in her arms. ..''
Sung by Eric Idle in Monty Python. The Meaning of Life (1983): ''Isn''t it awfully nice to have a penis / Isn''t it frightfully good to have-it-on / It''s swell to have a stiffy / It''s divine to own a dick / From the tiniest little tadger to the world''s biggest prick / So, three cheers for your Willy or John-Thomas / Hooray for your one-eyed-trouser-snake / Your piece of pork , your wife''s best-friend , your passing or your cock / You can wrap it up in ribbons, you can stuff it in your sock / But don''t take-it out in public or they''ll stick you in the dock and you won''t come back .''
Sung by Eric Idle in Monty Python. The Meaning of Life (1983): ''Isn''t it awfully nice to have a penis / Isn''t it frightfully good to have-it-on / It''s swell to have a stiffy / It''s divine to own a dick / From the tiniest little tadger to the world''s biggest prick / So, three cheers for your Willy or John-Thomas / Hooray for your one-eyed-trouser-snake / Your piece of pork , your wife''s best-friend , your passing or your cock / You can wrap it up in ribbons, you can stuff it in your sock / But don''t take-it out in public or they''ll stick you in the dock and you won''t come back .''
Sung by Eric Idle in Monty Python. The Meaning of Life (1983): ''Isn''t it awfully nice to have a penis / Isn''t it frightfully good to have-it-on / It''s swell to have a stiffy / It''s divine to own a dick / From the tiniest little tadger to the world''s biggest prick / So, three cheers for your Willy or John-Thomas / Hooray for your one-eyed-trouser-snake / Your piece of pork , your wife''s best-friend , your passing or your cock / You can wrap it up in ribbons, you can stuff it in your sock / But don''t take-it out in public or they''ll stick you in the dock and you won''t come back .''
Sung by Eric Idle in Monty Python. The Meaning of Life (1983): ''Isn''t it awfully nice to have a penis / Isn''t it frightfully good to have-it-on / It''s swell to have a stiffy / It''s divine to own a dick / From the tiniest little tadger to the world''s biggest prick / So, three cheers for your Willy or John-Thomas / Hooray for your one-eyed-trouser-snake / Your piece of pork , your wife''s best-friend , your passing or your cock / You can wrap it up in ribbons, you can stuff it in your sock / But don''t take-it out in public or they''ll stick you in the dock and you won''t come back .''

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