woody:

Colloquialism for a penis in erection. See penis for synonyms.
See Also: acousticophilia, be your own best friend, bisexual, braille, brothel, child molester, fake it, feel funny about, fellatrice, fellatrix, fuck-face, great lover, have it in, having sex with someone you love, luff, male organ, male organ of generation, male organ of reproduction, pull some lumber, relationship, sex, sex with someone you love, sexual intercourse, sword swallower, ultraviolet wand, violet wand, wand, womb

Quotes Containing woody:
Woody Allen: ''I have an intense desire to return to the womb ; anybodys.''
Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) to Annie (Diane Keaton) in Annie Hall (1977): ''Don''t knock masturbation! It''s sex with someone I love .'' Off-screen Woody Allen also said: ''I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it''s fantastic.''
Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) to Annie (Diane Keaton) in Annie Hall (1977): ''Don''t knock masturbation! It''s sex with someone I love .'' Off-screen Woody Allen also said: ''I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five, it''s fantastic.''
Woody Allen: ''I''m a practicing heterosexual but bisexuality immediately doubles your chances for a date on Saturday night.''
Larry (Woody Harrelson) in The People vs. Larry Flynt (1996) : ''Well, opinions are like assholes, your Honor. Everybody''s got one.''
Barbara Stern (Caroline Aaron) to Clifford Stern (Woody Allen) in Crimes and Misdemeanors (1989): ''Once the sex goes it all goes.''
Lenny Weinrub (Woody Allen) to Linda Ash/Judy Cum (Miro Sorvino) in Mighty Aphrodite (1995): ''I''m sure that you''re a state-of-the-art fellatrix .''
Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) to Pam (Shelley Duvall) in Annie Hall (1977): 'I think there's too much burden placed on the orgasm to make-up for the empty areas in life .'
Andrew (Woody Allen) in A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy (1982): 'Sex alleviates tension and love causes it .'
Barbara Stern (Caroline Aaron) to Clifford Stern (Woody Allen) in Crimes and Misdemeanors (1989): ''Once the sex goes it all goes.''
Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) to Annie Hall (Diane Keaton) (1977): 'That was the most fun I ever had without laughing.'
Barbara Stern (Caroline Aaron) to Clifford (Woody Allen) in Crimes and Misdemeanors (1989): 'Once the sex goes it all goes.'
Andrew (Woody Allen) in A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy (1982): 'Sex alleviates tension and love causes it .'
Woody Allen in Crimes and Misdemeanors (1989): 'The last time I was inside a woman was when I was inside the Statue of Liberty.'
Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) after having-sex with Annie Hall (Diane Keaton)(1977): 'That was the most fun I ever had without laughing.'
Barbara Stern (Caroline Aaron) to Clifford Stern (Woody Allen) in Crimes and Misdemeanors (1989): 'Once the sex goes it all goes.'
Barbara Stern (Caroline Aaron) to Clifford Stern (Woody Allen) in Crimes and Misdemeanors (1989): 'Once the sex goes it all goes.'
Howard (Woody Allen) in The Front (1976): 'In my family the biggest sin was to buy retail.'
Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) to Pam (Shelley Duvall) in Annie Hall (1977): ''I think there''s too much burden placed on the orgasm to make-up for the empty areas in life .''
Sword-swallower Irmy (Mia Farrow), who just admitted having-sex with a student for $700, and (Max) Kleinman (Woody Allen) in Shadows and Fog (1992): - Irmy: 'I slept with one person for money . Does that makes me a whore?' - Kleinmann: 'No, only by the dictionary definition.'
Virgil Starkwell (Woody Allen) in Take the Money and Run (1969): 'In prison, I remember this psychiatrist asked if I had a girl and I said no . And he said: Do you think sex is dirty? And I said it is if you do-it right.'
Sonja (Diane Keaton) and Boris (Woody Allen) in Love and Death (1975): - Sonja: 'Sex without love is an empty experience.' - Boris : 'Yes, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.'
Countess (Olga Georges-Picot) and Boris (Woody Allen) in Love and Death (1975): - Countess Alexandrovna: ''You are the greatest lover I ever had.'' - Boris Grushenko: ''Well, I practice a lot when I''m alone.''
Larry Lipton (Woody Allen) in Manhattan Murder Mystery (1993): ''I''d fix Ted up with Helen Dubin, but they''d probably get-into an argument over penis-envy ; the poor guy suffers from it so.''
Annie (Diane Keaton) relating her conversation with her analyst to Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) in Annie Hall (1977) - Annie:''Then she mentioned penis-envy . Do you know about that?'' - Alvy: ''Me?! I''m one of the few males who suffer from that.''
Zelig (Woody Allen), the human chameleon, in Zelig (1983):''I worked with Freud in Vienna. We broke the concept of penis-envy . Freud felt it should be limited to women.''
Felding Mellish (Woody Allen) in Bananas (1971): ''I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in Braille. I used to rub the dirty parts .''
Felding Mellish (Woody Allen) in Bananas (1971): ''I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in Braille. I used to rub the dirty parts .''
Isaac Davis (Woody Allen) to Mary Wilke (Diane Keaton) in Manhattan (1979): 'There must be something wrong with me because I've never had a relationship with a woman that lasted longer than the one between Hitler and Eva Braun.'
Isaac Davis (Woody Allen) to his friend Yale (Michael Murphy) in Manhattan (1979): 'You shouldn't ask for my advice. When it comes to relationships with women I'm the winner of the August Strindberg Award.' August Strindberg is the misogynist Swedish author of Lucky Per's Journey.
Luna Schlosser (Diane Keaton) to Miles Monroe (Woody Allen), a man frozen in the year 1973 and brought back to life in the year 2173; now he wants to have a relationship with her in Sleeper (1973): 'But Miles, relationships between men and women don't last. That was proven by science. You see , there's a chemical in our bodies that makes it so. We all get-on each others nerves sooner or later.'
Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) to Annie (Diane Keaton) in Annie Hall (1977): 'A relationship , I think, is like a shark. You know , it has to constantly move forward or it dies. And I think what we have on our hands is a dead shark.'
Virgil Starkwell (Woody Allen) in Take the Money and Run (1969): 'In prison, I remember this psychiatrist asked if I had a girl and I said no . And he said: Do you think sex is dirty? And I said it is if you do-it right.'
Sonja (Diane Keaton) and Boris (Woody Allen) in Love and Death (1975): - Sonja: 'Sex without love is an empty experience.' - Boris : 'Yes, but as empty experiences go, it's one of the best.'
Annie (Diane Keaton) and Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) in Annie Hall (1977): - Annie: 'Do you love me?' - Alvy: 'Love is too weak a word... I luuurv you. I lOOOve you. I luff you, two f's.'
Virgil Starkwell (Woody Allen) walking in the park with Louise (Janet Margolin) in Take the Money and Run (1969): 'All I know is my heart was really pounding and I felt a funny tingling all over. I don't know . I was either in-love or I had smallpox.'
Miles Monroe (Woody Allen) in Sleeper (1973): ''Ma, I''ve got-something to tell you. Arlene and I have to get a divorce . She thinks I''m a pervert because I drank our water bed .''
Allan Felix (Woody Allen) in Play It Again, Sam (1972): 'I was incredible last night in bed . I never once had to sit up and consult the manual.'
Allan (Woody Allen) thinking of his wife Nancy in Play It Again, Sam (1972): ''I wonder if she actually had an orgasm in the two years we were married or did she fake-it that night?''
Hannah (Mia Farrow) and Mickey (Woody Allen) after being told that Mickey''s sperm count is too low for procreation in Hannah and Her Sisters (1986): - Hannah: ''Could you have ruined yourself somehow?'' - Mickey : ''How could I ruin myself?'' - Hannah: ''I don''t know . Excessive masturbation?'' - Mickey : ''Hey! You gonna start knocking my hobbies?''
Luna Schlosser (Diane Keaton) and Miles Monroe (Woody Allen) who was frozen in the year 1973 and awakened in 2173 in Sleeper (1973): - Luna: 'It's hard to believe you haven't had sex for two hundred years.' - Miles: 'Two hundred and four if you count my marriage .'
Virgil Starkwell (Woody Allen) walking in the park with Louise (Janet Margolin) in Take the Money and Run (1969): ''All I know is, my heart was really pounding and I felt a funny tingling all over. I don''t know . I was either in-love or I had smallpox.''
Chili Pepper (Woody Harrelson) to bouncer Chango/Stubby (Luis Guzman) in The Cowboy Way (1994): ''Speak English? Sabe English? Why that''s too bad because I was gonna tell you your face looks like a hat full of assholes. ''
Allan (Woody Allen) thinking of his wife Nancy in Play It Again, Sam (1972): ''I wonder if she actually had an orgasm in the two years we were married or did she fake-it that night?''
Countess (Olga Georges-Picot) and Boris (Woody Allen) in Love and Death (1975): - Countess Alexandrovna: ''You are the greatest lover I ever had.'' - Boris Grushenko: ''Well, I practice a lot when I''m alone.''
Clifford Stern (Woody Allen), a married man , tells his niece Jenny (Jenny Nichols) about his infatuation with Holly Reed (Mia Farrow) in Crimes and Misdemeanors (1989): ''My heart says one thing my head says another. It''s very hard to get your head and heart together in life . (...) In my case they''re not even friendly .''
Boris Grushenko (Woody Allen) in Love and Death (1975): ''Some men are heterosexual , and some men are homosexual , and some men don''t think about sex at all. They become lawyers.''
Allan Felix (Woody Allen) in Play It Again, Sam (1972): ''We went to Mexico for our honeymoon . I spent the entire two weeks in bed ... I had dysentery.''
Boris Grushenko (Woody Allen) in Love and Death (1975): ''Some men are heterosexual , and some men are homosexual , and some men don''t think about sex at all. They become lawyers.''
Teenager Tracy (Mariel Hemingway) and her middle-aged boyfriend Isaac Davis (Woody Allen) in Manhattan (1979): - Tracy: ''I told you before, I think I''m in-love-with you.'' - Isaac: ''Hey, don''t get carried away, okay?''
'Nothing worth knowing can be understood with the mind. Everything really valuable has to enter you through a different opening .' Isaac Davis (Woody Allen) to Mary Wilke (Diane Keaton) in Manhattan (1979)
Miles Monroe (Woody Allen) in Sleeper (1973): ''Ma, I''ve got-something to tell you. Arlene and I have to get a divorce . She thinks I''m a pervert because I drank our water bed .''
Allan Felix (Woody Allen) watching a dancer in a bar in Play It Again, Sam (1972): ''She''s a doll . I''d sell my mother to the Arabs for her.''
Felding Mellish (Woody Allen) in Bananas (1971): ''I once stole a pornographic book that was printed in Braille. I used to rub the dirty parts .''
The short megalomaniac Dr. Noah (Woody Allen) in Casino Royale (1967): ''A world (...) where a man , no matter how short, can score-with a top broad .''
The Fool (Woody Allen) trying to open the Queen''s (Lynn Redgrave) chastity-belt in "Everything You Always Wanted to Know About Sex" *But Were Afraid to Ask* (1972): ''With most grievous dispatch I will open the latch and get to her snatch .''
Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) in Annie Hall (1977): ''Lyndon Johnson is a politician. You know the ethics those guys have. It''s like a notch underneath child-molesters. ''
Vince Boudreaux (Woody Harrelson) in Play It To The Bone (1999): ''If a man builds a thousand bridges and sucks one dick , they don''t call him a bridge-builder; they call him a cocksucker .''
Allan (Woody Allen) and an imaginary Bogey (voice by Jerry Lacy) in Play It Again, Sam (1972): - Allan: ''What''s the matter with me? Why can''t I be cool? What''s the secret?'' - Bogey: ''There''s no secret, kid. Dames are simple. I never met one that didn''t understand a slap on the mouth or a slug from a .45.''
Boris (Woody Allen) in Love and Death (1975): ''I went to a brothel once in my life . I got hiccups. It was over like... (snaps his fingers) that.''
Allan (Woody Allen) thinking of his wife Nancy in Play It Again, Sam (1972): 'I wonder if she actually had an orgasm in the two years we were married or did she fake-it that night?'
Danny Rose (Woody Allen) in Broadway Danny Rose (1984): ''What are you talking about? Guilt is important. It''s important to feel guilt, otherwise you''re capable of terrible things. (...) I''m guilty all the time and I never did anything.''
Boris Grushenko (Woody Allen) in Love and Death (1975): ''Some men are heterosexual , and some men are homosexual , and some men don''t think about sex at all. They become lawyers.''
Countess Alexandrovna (Olga Georges-Picot) and Boris Grushenko (Woody Allen) in Love and Death (1975): - Alex: ''You are the greatest lover I ever had.'' - Boris : ''Well, I practice a lot when I''m alone.''
Hannah (Mia Farrow) and Mickey (Woody Allen) after being told that Mickey''s sperm count is too low for procreation in Hannah and Her Sisters (1986): - Hannah: ''Could you have ruined yourself somehow?'' - Mickey : ''How could I ruin myself?'' - Hannah: ''I don''t know . Excessive masturbation?'' - Mickey : ''Hey! You gonna start knocking my hobbies?''
Countess Alexandrovna (Olga Georges-Picot) and Boris Grushenko (Woody Allen) in Love and Death (1975): - Alex: ''You are the greatest lover I ever had.'' - Boris : ''Well, I practice a lot when I''m alone.''
The Detainer (Daliah Lavi), strapped naked on a couch , and the short madman Dr. Noah (Woody Allen) in Casino Royale (1967): - Detainer: ''Do you treat all the girls you desire this way?'' - Dr. Noah: ''Yes, oh yes . I undress them and tie them up . I learned that in the Boy Scouts.'' Hairdresser Rita (Julie Walters) and a client in Educating Rita (1983): - Client: ''Is that a book you''re reading? (...) What''s it called?'' - Rita: ''Of Human Bondage.'' - Client: ''Yeah? My husband''s got a lot of books like that.'' - Rita: ''Somerset Maugham books?'' - Client: ''No, bondage books.''
Isaac Davis (Woody Allen) and Mary Wilke (Diane Keaton) in Manhattan (1979): - Isaac: ''I have a kid. He''s being raised by two women at the moment.'' - Mary: ''Oh, you know , I think that works. They made some studies. I read it in one of the psychoanalytic quarterlies. You don''t need a male and two mothers are absolutely fine.'' - Isaac: ''Oh, really? Because I always feel very few people survive one mother .''
Isaac Davis (Woody Allen) and Mary Wilke (Diane Keaton) in Manhattan (1979): - Isaac: ''I have a kid. He''s being raised by two women at the moment.'' - Mary: ''Oh, you know , I think that works. They made some studies. I read it in one of the psychoanalytic quarterlies. You don''t need a male and two mothers are absolutely fine.'' - Isaac: ''Oh, really? Because I always feel very few people survive one mother .''

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