he/she:

Or: he-she :

1. Bisexual. See bisexual for synonyms.

2. An effeminate homosexual male.

3. A masculine woman . Also, an extremely masculine, cross-dressing women or an aggressive lesbian .

4. A transsexual or someone undergoing sex reassignment surgery (temporary status for a male-to-female transsexual who has begun hormonal therapy but has not had surgery for removal of the testes and penis).

5. A male transvestite prostitute .

See Also: a piece of meat, a piece of tail, abortion-on-demand, act, act of shame, adulterer, anal sex, anything in trousers, arse from elbow down, article, Athor, attractive, B-girl, babe, babe-a-licious, babellicious, bad reputation, ball-breaker, ball-buster, ball-busting, bar girl, beast with two backs, beating fantasies, belt-fed mortar, bend, bend over, betty, bicycle, bike, birdcage, birth control clinic, bisexual, bit of fluff, blackness, bobtail, bone, broad, bum, bumper, cabbage, Can you insert a Tampax?, carrying, Cateracts of the Nile, chew, chew it, christened with a pump handle, Circe, cock in her eye, cock-pleaser, collar and cuff, collars and cuffs, come across, come out, coming out, concubine, crack a pitcher, crack the pipkin, crack the pitcher, cracked pipkin, cracked pitcher, cuckold the parson, cunny, cunt, curvaceous, curvesome, curvy, cute number, cute trick, cyberfeminism, dairies, dame, deflower, diamond-digger, die for, divorce, do the beast with two backs, do the two-backed beast, doll, dorsal lithotomy, double entendre, double event, double feature, double moral standard, double sexual standard, double standard, draggle-tail, drawers, easy on the eyes, easy to look at, equipment, etcaetera, etcetera, fag hag, fair game, fake it, fanny, ferry, fine figure, flapper, flat-backer, flirt, flirtatious, flirty, French kiss, French kissing, fuck like a minx, fuckable, fucks like a minx, full-bosomed, fundament, funniment, game, gamester, gavabos, get physical, give a blow job, give head, go down on (someone), go potty, go to pot, good woman, goodies, gun, guttersnipe, hatch, hatchway, Hathor, have a reputation, he/she, heat, heels in the air, homely, horniness, hurl, in heat, Isolde, JAP, Jewish American Princess, lady-killer, ladylike, lib, libber, little woman, the, live wire, lost sex, make the beast with two backs, making the beast with two backs, man-proof, matrimony, measurements, melted butter, minx, misogyny, motor, mount, no, on the make, orgasm, pair, peach, pervert, phobia, picklepuss, pickup, piece, piece of meat, piece of tail, pissed off, pissing someone off, pitcher, PO-ed, poperin pear, pro, public ledger, put out, quandong, rasper, reputation, rosebush, s/he, saving it for marriage, saving it for the worms, sex appeal, sex appealing, sex drive, sexual asphyxia, sexually appealing, shake the sheets, she/he, slick chick, snap-on (tool), sourpuss, squirrel, street girl, street walker, street whore, street worker, streetwalker, streetwalking, stroke, Stroke-Ability Scale, sure thing, sweater girl, thing, tits and ass, to die for, token, tomboy, town bike, unwritten law, up one's butt, village bicycle, village bike, vomit [DEF[, walk the streets, wap, war paint, warheads, water works, Watering the Oak Tree, waterworks, well-equipped, wench, wench of the game, wet noodle, what it takes, whoopee, whore, wife, woman

Quotes Containing he/she:
Bob Weston (Tony Curtis) to psychologist Helen Gurley Brown (Natalie Wood) in Sex and the Single Girl (1964): ''She''d hit the ceiling if she thought you and me were sitting here alone. You know what she''d figure? She''d figure a broad as pretty as you as got to be on-the-make .''
''When a girl is under twenty-one, she''s protected by law. When she''s over sixty-five, she''s protected by nature. Anywhere in-between , she''s fair-game .'' Captain Matt Sherman (Cary Grant) in Operation Petticoat (1959)
''When a girl is under twenty-one, she''s protected by law. When she''s over sixty-five, she''s protected by nature. Anywhere in-between , she''s fair-game .'' Captain Matt Sherman (Cary Grant) in Operation Petticoat (1959)
''When a girl is under twenty-one, she''s protected by law. When she''s over sixty-five, she''s protected by nature. Anywhere in-between , she''s fair-game .'' Captain Matt Sherman (Cary Grant) in Operation Petticoat (1959)
''If she''s a dame , she wants romance .'' Eddie O''Brien (Gene Kelly) in Take Me Out to the Ball Game (1949)
''If she''s a dame , she wants romance .'' Eddie O''Brien (Gene Kelly) in Take Me Out to the Ball Game (1949)
''If she''s a dame , she wants romance .'' Eddie O''Brien (Gene Kelly) in Take Me Out to the Ball Game (1949)
Sheridan ''Sheri'' Whiteside (Monty Woolley) to his nurse in The Man Who Came to Dinner (1942): ''My great-aunt Elizabeth ate a box of chocolates every day of her life . She lived to be 102, and when she had been dead three days, she looked healthier than you.''
In Blume in Love (1973: ''She took your whoopee and whipped you with it .''
Molly Monahan (Barbara Stanwyck) to Jeff Butler (Joel McCrea) in Union Pacific (1939): ''You think I''m an outrageous flirt . (...) But didn''t you ever know that flirting get''s into a woman''s blood like fighting get''s into a man''s? Now a girl begins coquetting to discover if she has the power. Then she goes looking, like a fighter after a bully , for the hardest man to conquer, but it''s never the man she wants, it''s the pleasure of bringing him to her feet.''
Huey Walker (Dennis Hopper) about a busty redhead in Flashback (1989): ''She looks like she was shot in the back by a pair of Cruise missiles. ''
Whitney (Nicole Bilderback) in Bring It On (2000): ''She puts the itch in bitch .''
Joe (Bruce Boxleitner) in The Babe (1992): ''She''s got more curves than a scenic highway.''
Anonymous: ''She didn''t like to wrestle, but you should see her box .''
Wayne Campbell (Mike Meyers) and Garht Algar (Dana Carvey) about model Claudia Schiffer in Wayne''s World (1992): - Wayne: ''She''s a babe!'' - Garth: ''She''s magically babe-a-licious!'' - Wayne: ''She tested very high on the Stroke-Ability-Scale .''
Moose Malloy (Mike Mazurki) in Murder, My Sweet (1945): ''She was cute as lace pants.''
Eddie O''Brien (Gene Kelly) in Take Me Out to the Ball Game (1949): ''If she''s a dame , she wants romance .''
Alan to Hugh Grant in Notting Hill (1999): ''She kisses like a nymphomaniac on death row.''
Seth Winnick about ''hot'' Chelsea Turner in Love Sucks (2000): ''She could steam-clean carpets. ''
Austin Powers (Mike Myers) in Austin Powers (1998): ''I''ll bet she shags like a minx .''
Connie (Audrey Meadows) about Cathy (Doris Day) in That Touch of Mink (1962): ''She''s going to spend the rest of her life saing: ''I''m not that kind of a girl''. I''m only afraid that some day, before she''s finished saying it , she will be.''
Eddie O''Brien (Gene Kelly) in Take Me Out to the Ball Game (1949):''If she''s a dame , she wants romance .''
Han Solo in Star Wars: ''She may not look like much, but she''s got it where it counts, kid.''
Han Solo in Star Wars: ''She may not look like much, but she''s got it where it counts, kid.''
Sheridan ''Sheri'' Whiteside (Monty Woolley) to his nurse in The Man Who Came to Dinner (1942): ''My great-aunt Elizabeth ate a box of chocolates every day of her life . She lived to be 102, and when she had been dead three days, she looked healthier than you.''
Clarence Worley (Christian Slater) in True Romance (1993):''Look at her! She looks like she fell off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down .''
Junior (Bob Hope) and Ebeneezer (Paul E. Burns) speaking about Mike (Jane Russell) a performer in Son of Paleface (1952): - Junior: ''She''s really got it!'' - Ebeneezer: ''She''s got what?'' - Junior: ''I don''t know but if we could bottle it we could make a fortune.''
Larry Burrows (James Belushi) and his father Harry (Pat Corley) watching a very beautiful girl go by in Mr. Destiny (1990): - Larry: ''Sometimes I get the distinct feeling I''m missing out on something.'' - Harry: ''Well, what she''s got she''s got plenty you don''t need.''
Larry Burrows (James Belushi) and his father Harry (Pat Corley) watching a very beautiful girl go by in Mr. Destiny (1990): - Larry: ''Sometimes I get the distinct feeling I''m missing out on something.'' - Harry: ''Well, what she''s got she''s got plenty you don''t need.''
Junior (Bob Hope) and Ebeneezer (Paul E. Burns) speaking about Mike (Jane Russell) a performer in Son of Paleface (1952): - Junior: ''She''s really got it!'' - Ebeneezer: ''She''s got what?'' - Junior: ''I don''t know but if we could bottle it we could make a fortune.''
Beryl Muddle (J. McKenzie) and Wally Mellish (Colin Frields) in Mr. Reliable (1996): - Beryl: 'Mom says that if she was married to you she would poison your coffee.' - Wally: 'If I was married to her, I'd drink it .'
Jerry (Jack Lemmon) watching Sugar Kane (Marilyn Monroe) walk in Some Like It Hot (1959): ''Look how she moves. Just like Jell-O on springs. She must have a built-in motor or something.''
''Not ''Anytime Annie''?! (...) She only said ''no'' once and then she couldn''t hear the question.'' Andy Lee (George E. Stone) speaking of Ann Lowell (Ginger Rogers) in 42nd Street (1933).
''Not ''Anytime Annie''?! (...) She only said ''no'' once and then she couldn''t hear the question.'' Andy Lee (George E. Stone) speaking of Ann Lowell (Ginger Rogers) in 42nd Street (1933).
Junior (Bob Hope) and Ebeneezer (Paul E. Burns) speaking about Mike (Jane Russell) a performer in Son of Paleface (1952): - Junior: ''She''s really got it!'' - Ebeneezer: ''She''s got what?'' - Junior: ''I don''t know but if we could bottle it we could make a fortune.''
Lt. Frank Drebin (Leslie Nielsen) describing Jane Spencer (Priscilla Presley) in The Naked Gun (1988): ''Her hair was the color of gold in old paintings. She had a full set of curves and the kind of legs you''d kinda love to suck on for a day. She was giving me a look I could feel in my hip pocket.''
Kirbo (Emilio Estevez) in St. Elmo''s Fire (1985): ''She''s not just a girl . She''s the only evidence of God that I can find on this entire planet, with the exception of the mystical force that removes one of my socks from the dryer every time I do the laundry .''
Peter Warne (Clark Gable) to Ellie''s (Claudette Colbert) father Alexander Andrews (Walter Connelly) in It Happened One Night (1934): ''What she needs is a guy who''d take a sock at her once a day whether she deserves it or not.''
Peter Warne (Clark Gable) to Ellie's (Claudette Colbert) father Alexander Andrews (Walter Connelly) in It Happened One Night (1934): 'What she needs is a guy who'd take a sock at her once a day whether she deserves it or not.'
Paula (Lana Turner) and Jonny (Clark Gable) in Somewhere I''ll Find You (1942): - Paula Lane: ''Any gal that listens to the howl of a wolf is a gonner.'' - Jonny Davis: ''Little Riding Hood didn''t do so bad .'' - Paula Lane: ''She didn''t do so good either... ''til she got wise.''
Garth Algar (Dana Carvey) and Wayne Campbell (Mike Myers) in Wayne's World (1992): - Garth: 'Wayne, what do you do if every time you see this one incredible woman you think you're going to hurl?' - Wayne: 'I say hurl . If you blow-chunks and she comes back , she's yours. If you spew and she bolts, it was never meant to be.'
Allan (Woody Allen) thinking of his wife Nancy in Play It Again, Sam (1972): ''I wonder if she actually had an orgasm in the two years we were married or did she fake-it that night?''
Henry Davenport (David Swift) and Joy Merryweather (Susannah Doyle) in Drop the Dead Dorkey (1990): - Henry: ''Last week I took this actress back to my flat. She had five orgasms!'' - Joy: ''Oh, she must be a bloody good actress!''
'I hope you don't mind working under a woman .' Michelle Huddleston (Brenda Bakke) to Topper Harley (Charlie Sheen) in Hot Shots! Part Deux (1993): 'She means taking orders from a woman , or does she?'
Michael O''Hara (Orson Welles) in The Lady from Shanghai (1948):''Personally, I don''t like a girlfriend to have a husband . If she''ll fool a husband I figure she''ll fool me.''
Henry Davenport (David Swift) and Joy Merryweather (Susannah Doyle) in Drop the Dead Dorkey (1990): - Henry: ''Last week I took this actress back to my flat. She had five orgasms!'' - Joy: ''Oh, she must be a bloody good actress!''
Allan (Woody Allen) thinking of his wife Nancy in Play It Again, Sam (1972): ''I wonder if she actually had an orgasm in the two years we were married or did she fake-it that night?''
''She''s so anally retentive she wouldn''t sit down for fear of sucking up the furniture.'' Patsy Stone (Joanna Lumley) in Absolutely Fabulous (1992)
''She''s so anally retentive she wouldn''t sit down for fear of sucking up the furniture.'' Patsy Stone (Joanna Lumley) in Absolutely Fabulous (1992)
Andy Lee (George E. Stone) speaking of Ann Lowell (Ginger Rogers) in 42nd Street (1933): 'Not 'Anytime Annie'?! (...) She only said 'no' once and then she couldn't hear the question.'
Andrew Dice Clay guest starring on the Rodney Dangerfield comedy special Nothin'' Goes Right (1988): ''Old Mother Hubbard / Went to the cupboard / To get her old dog a bone . / She bent over / Rover took over / She got a bone of her own.''
''Her hair was the color of gold in old paintings. She had a full set of curves which nobody had been able to improve upon. She was giving me the kind of look I could feel in my hip pocket.'' Philip Marlowe (Robert Mitchum) speaking about Velma Grayle (Charlotte Rampling) in Farewell, My Lovely (1975)
David Larrabee (Greg Kinnear) and Linus Larrabee (Harrison Ford) in Sabrina (1995) - David: ''She''s a real woman , not a, you know .'' - Linus: ''Transvestite?'' - David: ''No, she''s not a bimbo .''
''You know Effie. When she gets riled up , she''''l fight a rattlesnake and give it the first two bites. '' Egbert Floud (Charlie Ruggles) speaking of his wife in Ruggles of Red Gap (1935)
Lt. Frank Drebin (Leslie Nielsen) describing Jane Spencer (Priscilla Presley) in The Naked Gun (1988): ''Her hair was the color of gold in old paintings. She had a full set of curves and the kind of legs you''d kinda love to suck on for a day. She was giving me a look I could feel in my hip pocket.''
''The difference between a lady and a flower girl is not how she behaves but how she is treated.'' Eliza Doolittle (Audrey Hepburn) in My Fair Lady (1964)
Clarence Worley (Christian Slater) in True Romance (1993):''Look at her! She looks like she fell off the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down .''
Lorelei Lee (Marilyn Monroe) to Dorothy Shaw (Jane Russell) who is in-love-with a cheap detective in Gentlemen Prefer Blondes (1953): - Lorelei: 'You don't want to end up with a loveless marriage , do you?' - Dorothy: 'Me?! Loveless?!' - Lorelei: 'That's right. Because if a girl spends all her time worrying about the money she doesn't have, how is she going to have any time for being in love? I want you to find happiness and stop having fun.'
Peter Warne (Clark Gable) to Ellie's (Claudette Colbert) father Alexander Andrews (Walter Connelly) in It Happened One Night (1934): 'What she needs is a guy who'd take a sock at her once a day whether she deserves it or not.'
Andrew Dice Clay guest starring on the Rodney Dangerfield comedy special Nothin'' Goes Right (1988): ''Old Mother Hubbard / Went to the cupboard / To get her old dog a bone . / She bent over / Rover took over / She got a bone of her own.''
Henry Davenport (David Swift) and Joy Merryweather (Susannah Doyle) in Drop the Dead Dorkey (1990): - Henry: 'Last week I took this actress back to my flat. She had five orgasms!' - Joy: 'Oh, she must be a bloody good actress!'
Allan (Woody Allen) thinking of his wife Nancy in Play It Again, Sam (1972): 'I wonder if she actually had an orgasm in the two years we were married or did she fake-it that night?'
''The difference between a lady and a flower girl is not how she behaves but how she is treated.'' Eliza Doolittle (Audrey Hepburn) in My Fair Lady (1964)
''The difference between a lady and a flower girl is not how she behaves but how she is treated.'' Eliza Doolittle (Audrey Hepburn) in My Fair Lady (1964)
Wayne Campbell (Mike Meyers) speaking of model Claudia Schiffer in Wayne''s World (1992): ''She''s a babe! She tested very high on the Stroke-Ability-Scale .''
Wayne Campbell (Mike Meyers) speaking of model Claudia Schiffer in Wayne''s World (1992): ''She''s a babe! She tested very high on the Stroke-Ability-Scale .''
The Emcee (Joel Grey) in Cabaret (1972): 'I only yesterday said: I want you for my wife . And she said: Your wife , what would she want with me?'
Sung by the chorus in 42nd Street (1933): ''Matrimony is baloney . She''ll be wanting alimony in a year or so.''
''Pay a woman a compliment, she tries to turn it into a contract.'' Venneker (Peter Ustinov) in The Sundowners (1960)
Mrs. Garner (Doreen Lang) to Terry Dean (Paul Hogan) in Almost an Angel (1990): 'A woman should be told she's attractive and desirable otherwise she ceases to be either.'
Olga (Dennie Moore), the manicurist, about Chrystal Allen (Joan Crawford) in The Women (1939): ''She''s got those eyes that run up-and-down men like a searchlight.''
''Pay a woman a compliment, she tries to turn it into a contract.'' Venneker (Peter Ustinov) in The Sundowners (1960)
''Pay a woman a compliment, she tries to turn it into a contract.'' Venneker (Peter Ustinov) in The Sundowners (1960)
Andrew Benson (Kenneth Branagh) in Peter?s Friends (1992): 'She seems to exist on a diet of fresh air and boinking .'
Iram Katourian (Jack Lemmon) talking to his mistress Irene (Joanna Gleason) about his wife Millie (Talia Shire) in For Richer, For Poorer (1992): - Irene: ''Iram, do you really think that your money has anything to do with Millie''s sex drive?'' - Iram: ''Oh, absolutely. You''ve heard the phrase: power is an aphrodisiac? That applies to marriage especially. See, a poor man has tremendous power over his wife . She needs him. Without his support, her, the kids... she humps the hell out of him. The richer a man is the less his wife is depending upon him, the less power he has over her and the less sexy he becomes to her. It''s a law of nature.'' - Irene: ''Horniness equals dependence times poverty squared.''
Philo Grant (Michael Wincott) in Strange Days (1995): 'The only time a whore should open her mouth is when she is giving head .'
Old Atrocity (Walter Brennan) speaking of Mary Rutledge/Swan (Miriam Hopkins) in Barbary Coast (1935): 'She can be the orneriest critter!'
Junior (Bob Hope) in Son of Paleface (1952): ''I like to kiss this girl because she has just the type of lips I like, one on top and one on the bottom .''
Wyatt Earp (James Garner) about Calamity Jane in Sunset (1988): ''Mary Jane Canary was a dear and selfless woman , but she looked like an unmade bed .''
Eric Stratton (Tim Matheson) talking about his date?s breasts in National Lampoon?s Animal-House (1978): ''She''s got a couple of major league gavabos .''
Joan Rivers'' Salute to Heidy Abromowitz (1985): ''In a sweater she looked like a walking Dairy State.''
Eve (Alicia Silverstone) to Adam (Brendan Fraser) in Blast From the Past (1999): ''She''s got bitch written all over her.''
Dark Helmet (Rick Moranis) at the sight of a pretty woman in Spaceballs (1987): ''I''ll bet she gives great helmet .''
''She was real easy-to-look-at but I hoped I never saw her again.'' Smith (Bruce Willis) in Last Man Standing (1999)
Beatrice Skeffington (Bette Davis) quoting her husband in Mr. Skeffington (1944): ''Job says that a woman is beautiful only when she is loved.''
Lawrence Paros. The Erotic Tongue (1984): ''Unfortunately, the only question he [the male] has in mind is: Is she easy (since 17th C), loose (since 15th C), fast (18th C), swift (late 19-20th C), speedy (c. 1923), light (14th C), or convenient (19thC)? Does she go all the way(mid-20th C), the whole route (19-20th C), or the limit (c. 1916)? Once we have the answer to that question, we have established what is called a reputation (since 18th C).''
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): ''When women go wrong, men go right after them.''
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): ''When women go wrong, men go right after them.''
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): ''When women go wrong, men go right after them.''
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): ''When women go wrong, men go right after them.''
Jonathan (Jack Nicholson) speaking of Cindy (Rita Moreno) in Carnal Knowledge (1971): ''You know her problem? She wants balls .''
Robert Schimmel guest star on the Rodney Dangerfield comedy special Nothin'' Goes Right (1988): ''Some of these guys only like it if they think the girl doesn''t like it ; it''s some sort of weird power trip thing for these guys. It''s like anal-sex . I think if you really wanted to try that with a girl and she said: ''OK, but be really gentle because no one ever did anything like this to me before.'' You''d get the hard-on of a lifetime. But if she said: ''Give me that big dick and drive me around the block .'' You wouldn''t be able to get-it-up if there was money involved.''
Alma (Thelma Ritter) to Jan Morrow (Doris Day) in Pillow Talk (1959): ''If there''s anything worse than a woman living alone, it''s a woman saying she likes it .''
Roslyn Taber (Marilyn Monroe) explaining why she is divorcing in The Misfits (1961): ''If I''m going to be alone, I want to be by myself.''
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): ''When women go wrong, men go right after them.''
Dorothy Parker: 'That woman speaks eighteen languages and she can't say 'no' in any one of them.'
'She can chew on my mocassin anytime.' Joe Lightcloud (Elvis Presley) in Stay Away, Joe (1968)
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): ''When women go wrong, men go right after them.''
Tillie Schlaine (Carol Burnett) to Pete Seltzer (Walter Matthau) in Pete ''n'' Tillie (1972): - Tillie: ''What do you think?'' - Pete: ''I think you are a fine-figure of a woman .'' - Tillie: ''I wasn''t asking about me. I was asking about the apartment.'' - Pete: ''Oh. It needs a man''s touch .'' -Tillie: ''Incidentally, for future reference, no woman who fancies she has a good-figure likes to hear she''s a fine-figure of a woman . The two aren''t the same at all.''
Old Atrocity (Walter Brennan) speaking of Mary Rutledge/Swan (Miriam Hopkins) in Barbary Coast (1935): 'She can be the orneriest critter!'
Old Atrocity (Walter Brennan) speaking of Mary Rutledge/Swan (Miriam Hopkins) in Barbary Coast (1935): ''She can be the orneriest critter!''
Lawrence Paros. The Erotic Tongue (1984): ''Unfortunately, the only question he [the male] has in mind is: Is she easy (since 17th C), loose (since 15th C), fast (18th C), swift (late 19-20th C), speedy (c. 1923), light (14th C), or convenient (19thC)? Does she go all the way(mid-20th C), the whole route (19-20th C), or the limit (c. 1916)? Once we have the answer to that question, we have established what is called a reputation (since 18th C).''
Billie Dawn (Melanie Griffith) to her boyfriend (John Goodman) when she was almost caught kissing Paul Verral (Don Johnson) in Born Yesterday (1993): ''Paul just taught me a little French .''
Frank Musso (Joe Mantegna) about Norma Jean (Cassidy Rae) in National Lampoon''s Favorite Deadly Sins (1995): ''She was the only woman I ever met who could French-kiss through bulletproof glass.''
Joey O''Brien (Robin Williams) in Cadillac Man (1990): ''Even a blind man can tell she''s hot .''
Frank Harris (Brad Pitt) about Holly Wood (Kim Basinger) in Cool Word (1992): ''It''s Holly. I think she''s in-heat again.''
Dorothy Parker: ''That woman speaks eighteen languages and she can''t say ''no'' in any one of them.''
''She seems to exist on a diet of fresh air and boinking .'' Andrew Benson (Kenneth Branagh) in Peter''s Friends (1992)
Dorothy Parker: ''That woman speaks eighteen languages and she can''t say ''no'' in any one of them.''
''She seems to exist on a diet of fresh air and boinking .'' Andrew Benson (Kenneth Branagh) in Peter''s Friends (1992)
Howard Bannister (Ryan O''Neal) pushing Judy Maxwell (Barbra Streisand) on the ledge of his hotel room because his jealous fiance Eunice is knocking at the door in What''s Up, Doc? (1972): - Judy: ''I can''t! I''m terrified of heights. I have heights-a-phobia.'' - Howard: ''Look, there''s a ledge.'' - Judy: ''I have ledge-a-phobia.'' - Howard: ''She has a violent temper.'' - Judy: ''I can''t.'' - Howard: ''She knows karate.'' - Judy: ''Maybe I can .''
Romy Weinberger (Lisa Kudrow) in Romy and Michelle''s High School Reunion (1998): ''God, she''s really PO-ed .''
Professor Henry Higgins (Leslie Howard) in Pygmalion (1938):'I find that the moment I let a woman make friends with me, she becomes jealous, exacting and a confounded nuisance.'
Judy (Karen Fields) in Sleepaway Camp (1983): ''She''s a real carpenter''s dream; flat-as-a-board and needs a screw!''
Judy (Karen Fields) in Sleepaway Camp (1983): ''She''s a real carpenter''s dream; flat-as-a-board and needs a screw!''
Porthos (Oliver Platt) to D''Artagnan (Chris O''Donnell) in The Three Musketeers (1993): ''D''Artagnan, if you are to be a proper musketeer you shall have to be schooled in the manly art of wenching. (...) The secret of wenching is in the first kiss for in that first kiss a lasting impression is made. Right, ladies? If it is weak she''ll think you''re weak. If it is comical she''ll think you''re a clown. (...) And as a musketeer is never weak and only rarely a clown you''re first kiss must be all the things that you are. Like this.''
Mike Campbell (Mike Meyers) about Claudia Schiffer in Wayne''s World (1992): ''She tested vey high on the strokability scale''.
Mike Campbell (Mike Meyers) about Claudia Schiffer in Wayne''s World (1992): ''She tested vey high on the strokability scale''.
Iram Katourian (Jack Lemmon) talking to his mistress Irene (Joanna Gleason) about his wife Millie (Talia Shire) in For Richer, For Poorer (1992): - Irene: 'Iram, do you really think that your money has anything to do with Millie's sex drive?' - Iram: 'Oh, absolutely. You've heard the phrase: power is an aphrodisiac? That applies to marriage especially. See, a poor man has tremendous power over his wife . She needs him. Without his support, her, the kids... she humps the hell out of him. The richer a man is the less his wife is depending upon him, the less power he has over her and the less sexy he becomes to her. It's a law of nature.' - Irene: 'Horniness equals dependence times poverty squared.'
Wyatt Earp (James Garner) about Calamity Jane in Sunset (1988): ''Mary Jane Canary was a dear and selfless woman , but she looked like an unmade bed .''
Chrissy (Rita Wilson) and Roberta (Rosie O''Donnell) looking at the magazine cover featuring Teeny Terrell (Melanie Griffith) in Now and Then (1995): - Chrissy: ''Can you believe this tramp? Now what is it that she has that gets people so excited?'' - Roberta: ''Long legs, a tiny waist and perky breasts. ''
Chrissy (Rita Wilson) and Roberta (Rosie O''Donnell) looking at the magazine cover featuring Teeny Terrell (Melanie Griffith) in Now and Then (1995): - Chrissy: ''Can you believe this tramp? Now what is it that she has that gets people so excited?'' - Roberta: ''Long legs, a tiny waist and perky breasts. ''
Movie producer Frank Musso (Joe Mantegna) seduced by Norma Jean Hazelrigg (Cassidy Rae) in National Lampoon's Favorite Deadly Sins (1995): 'Before I knew what was happening she was doing things to me that I hadn't even done to me, things that Masters never told Johnson, that Kinsey kept out of his report. And when it was all over I found myself in much deeper than I had planned.'
Una (Lauren Tom) about her superstitious China-born mother in The Joy Luck Club (1993):''So my mom sees this miror at the foot of our bed and she says: Aie-ya! A mirror is bad luck. All the romance will hit the mirror, pooom, go back the opposite direction.''
Benjy Stone (Mark Linn-Baker) and Alan Swan (Peter O''Toole) about women in general in My Favorite Year (1982): - Benjy:''I don''t know what she wants.'' - Alan:''Romance, Stone. That''s the only thing we can be sure they all want.''
From Bulletproof (1997): Adam Sandler and Charlie , a hotel clerk: - Adam : ''What do you think? Me, you, the old lady? A little sandwich action.'' - Clerk: ''What do you mean?'' - Adam : ''Come on . You''re a piece of white bread , she''s a piece of white bread , I''m the salami ; let''s give it a shot.''
Producer-director Oscar Jaffe (John Barrymore) about stage star Lily Garland/Mildred Plotka (Carole Lombard) in Twentieth Century (1934): 'I wouldn't take that woman back if she and I were the last people in the world ... and the future of the human race depended on it .'
Madge (Bette Davis) in Cabin in the Cotton (1932):'I'd love to kiss you, but I just washed my hair.' She says it with a thick accent: 'Ah'd love t'kiss you but ah jes washed mah hayuh.'
Matt Nolan (James Cagney) in Taxi! (1932): 'I wouldn't go-for that dame if she was the last woman on earth... and I'd just got out of the navy.'
''Do you know that she makes forty-five dollars a week and sends her mother a hundred of it .'' Ann Lowell/Anytime Annie (Ginger Rogers) maligning a co-dancer in 42nd Street (1933).
''Twenty years on the China seas and she never lost a spangle.'' Jamesy McArdle (Wallace Beery) watching China Doll Portland (Jean Harlow) walking down the steps in a spangled dress in China Seas (1935).
Edward Lewis (Richard Gere) and Vivian Ward (Julia Roberts) in Pretty Woman (1990): - Edward: 'So, what happens after he climbs the tower and rescues her?' - Vivian:'She rescues him right back!'
''That''s Henry''s mother , the black sheep of the family . She took so many strokes in the Sixties they called her the U.S. Open.'' Kitty (Catherine Zeta Jones) about her future mother-in-law Duchess Lucinda (Barbara Hershey) in Splitting Heirs (1993)
Algy Shaw (Bud Abbott) and Wellington Phlug (Lou Costello) in Pardon My Sarong (1942): - Algy: ''Wouldn''t you marry a pretty girl like that?'' - Phlug: ''No, I''d rather marry a homely girl .'' - Algy: ''Why?'' - Phlug: ''Well, if you marry a pretty girl like that, she''s liable to run away.'' - Algy: ''A homely girl is apt to run away too.'' - Phlug: ''Yeah, but who cares. ''
Opal Gilstrap (Raye Dowell), a lesbian in She''s Gotta Have It (1986): ''You''re not born a lesbian or heterosexual . Both traits are within us. We all have the potential to go either way .''
Julie Blair (Karen Sharpe) and Jerome Littlefield (Jerry Lewis) in The Disorderly Orderly (1964): - Julie: ''You loved your father, didn''t you?'' - Jerome: ''Love you can''t help, but I also respected and admired my father. Respect and admiration you have to earn.'' - Julie: ''Who else have you ever loved?'' - Jerome: ''Oh, well, I loved his wife . She was like a mother to me.''
Julie Blair (Karen Sharpe) and Jerome Littlefield (Jerry Lewis) in The Disorderly Orderly (1964): - Julie: ''You loved your father, didn''t you?'' - Jerome: ''Love you can''t help, but I also respected and admired my father. Respect and admiration you have to earn.'' - Julie: ''Who else have you ever loved?'' - Jerome: ''Oh, well, I loved his wife . She was like a mother to me.''
''That''s Henry''s mother , the black sheep of the family . She took so many strokes in the Sixties they called her the U.S. Open.'' Kitty (Catherine Zeta Jones) about her future mother-in-law Duchess Lucinda (Barbara Hershey) in Splitting Heirs (1993)
''Do you know that she makes forty-five dollars a week and sends her mother a hundred of it .'' Ann Lowell/Anytime Annie (Ginger Rogers) maligning a co-dancer in 42nd Street (1933).
''Twenty years on the China seas and she never lost a spangle.'' Jamesy McArdle (Wallace Beery) watching China Doll Portland (Jean Harlow) walking down the steps in a spangled dress in China Seas (1935).
Annie (Diane Keaton) relating her conversation with her analyst to Alvy Singer (Woody Allen) in Annie Hall (1977) - Annie:''Then she mentioned penis-envy . Do you know about that?'' - Alvy: ''Me?! I''m one of the few males who suffer from that.''
Uncle Benny (Ned Beatty) peeping on his sunbathing neighbor Storm Reynolds (Sam Jenkins) with a looking glass in Ed and His Dead Mother (1994): ''Sex! That''s what it''s all about. From the onset of puberty it''s what occupies ninety percent of our time, the pursuit of sex , right? Ed, sex is life and if it was a pronoun she''d be IT.''
Topper Harley (Charley Sheen) in Hot Shots! (1991): ''My uncle used to tell me, not playing to win is like sleeping with your sister; sure she''s a great piece-of-tail with a blouse full of goodies , but it''s just illegal.''
Lt. Frank Drebin (Leslie Nielsen) to Tanya after she offered to take him on as her second lover in The Naked Gun 33 1/3 - The Final Insult (1994): ''Kinky, but I like my sex the way I play basketball: one on one and with as little dribbling as possible.''
Lesbian Opal Gilstrap (Raye Dowell) in She''s Gotta Have It (1986): ''You''re not born a lesbian or heterosexual . Both traits are within us. We all have the potential to go either way .''
Andrew Dice Clay guest starring on the Rodney Dangerfield comedy special Nothin'' Goes Right (1988): "My girlfriend , she''s like: ''What about foreplay?'' I go: ''Honey, didn''t I slap you around already today?''"
Ned Ravine''s (Armand Assante) voice over commentary about Lola Cain (Sean Young) in Fatal Instinct (1993): ''Funny thing about women. They''ll do anything to keep up appearances. Take Lola Cain. She''d rather look like a hardcase with bloody knuckles than a soft touch with a soiled reputation . Still, I had to admit, there was something about her that made me sweat bullets .''
Algy Shaw (Bud Abbott) and Wellington Phlug (Lou Costello) in Pardon My Sarong (1942): - Algy: ''Wouldn''t you marry a pretty girl like that?'' - Phlug: ''No, I''d rather marry a homely girl .'' - Algy: ''Why?'' - Phlug: ''Well, if you marry a pretty girl like that, she''s liable to run away.'' - Algy: ''A homely girl is apt to run away too.'' - Phlug: ''Yeah, but who cares. ''
Professor Henry Higgins (Leslie Howard) speaking of Eliza Doolittle (Wendy Hiller) in Pygmalion (1938): ''She''s so deliciously low, so horribly dirty (...) I shall make a duchess of this draggle-tailed guttersnipe .''
Zeke (Tully Marshall) to Breck Coleman (John Wayne) in The Big Trail (1931): ''Well, you can never tell how a woman feels by the way she acts. They''re''s all riddles all of ''em. And you just gotta guess ''em. And no matter which way you guess, you''re wrong.''
Zeke (Tully Marshall) to Breck Coleman (John Wayne) in The Big Trail (1931): 'Well, you can never tell how a woman feels by the way she acts. They're's all riddles all of 'em. And you just gotta guess 'em. And no matter which way you guess, you're wrong.'
A typical Fishism by Richard Fish (Greg Germann) from the TV series Ally McBeal (1997): 'You know , I had a great aunt once who said if you stare at a beautiful woman too long, you turn to stone. She was partially right.'
Allen Francis Doyle (Glenn Quinn) and Angel/Angelus (David Boreanaz) in the TV series Angel (1999): - Allen: 'She has a certain... charm to her.' - Angel: 'You think she's a hottie.' - Allen: 'Oh yeah, she's a stiffener, I can't lie about that.'
Anita Miller (Zooey Deschanel), Elaine Miller (Frances McDormand) and William Miller (Patrick Fugit) in Almost Famous (2000): - Anita Miller: ''Feck you!'' (...) - Elaine Miller: ''Well there it is, your sister used the F- word.'' - William Miller: ''I think she said feck .'' - Elaine Miller: ''What''s the difference?'' - William Miller: ''The letter u.''
P.I. Philip Marlow (Dick Powell) speaking of Ann Grayle (Anne Shirley) in Murder, My Sweet (1945): ''Not a beautiful face but a good face . She had a face like a Sunday school picnic .''
Chrissy (Rita Wilson) and Roberta (Rosie O''Donnell) looking at the magazine cover featuring Teeny Terrell (Melanie Griffith) in Now and Then (1995): - Chrissy: ''Can you believe this tramp? Now what is it that she has that gets people so excited?'' - Roberta: ''Long legs, a tiny waist and perky breasts. ''
Captain Cummings (Cary Grant) and Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933) - Captain Cummings: ''Haven''t you ever met a man who could make you happy?'' - Lady Lou: ''Sure, lots of times.''
'What is that man doing in my drawers!?' Nora Charles (Myrna Loy) when she sees a detective searching her commode drawers in The Thin Man (1934)
Bill Dolworth (Burt Lancaster) spying of the revolutionary stronghold spots an old friend in The Professionals (1966): 'Lieutenant Sisi Chickita. Now there's a woman worth a ransom. She never says no .'
Fun-loving Flicienne (Eva Gabor) explains how she came to take a champagne bath with a Duke in A New Kind of Love (1963): 'How could I say no when it's so much easier to say yes?'
Ed Walters (Tim Robbins) after falling in love-at-first-sight of Catherine Boyd (Meg Ryan) in I.Q. (1994): ''You wouldn''t believe it . I looked at her, she looked at me, and it happened. You could feel it . It was like death, but in a good way .''
Captain Cummings (Cary Grant) and Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933) - Captain Cummings: ''Haven''t you ever met a man who could make you happy?'' - Lady Lou: ''Sure, lots of times.''
Anne Ashmond''s (Sarah Churchill) answer to Tom Bowen''s (Fred Astaire) question why she had chosen to become a dancer in Royal Wedding (1951): ''I figured that if I danced when I was happy I should be happy when I danced.''
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): - Friend: ''Ah, Lady Lou, you''re a fine gal , a fine woman .'' - Lady Lou: ''One of the finest women that ever walked the streets .''
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): - Friend: ''Ah, Lady Lou, you''re a fine gal , a fine woman .'' - Lady Lou: ''One of the finest women that ever walked the streets .''
Mae West: 'An orgasm a day keeps the doctor away.' As Mavis Arden in Go West, Young Man she said: 'A thrill a day keeps the chills away.'
George Bernard Shaw: ''It is assumed that a woman must wait motionless, until she is wooed. This is how the spider waits for the fly .''
Humorist James Thurber (1894-1961) rephrasing the clich: a woman''s place is in the home/kitchen: ''A woman''s place is in the wrong.'' Of course, as Lady Lou (Mae West) says in She Done Him Wrong (1933): ''When women go wrong, men go right after them.'' Mort Sahl also paraphrased the clich: ''A woman''s place is in the stove.'' Warrick (Sir Cedric Hardwicke) in Valley of the Sun (1942): ''The way to a woman''s heart is to get her out of the kitchen .''
Benjy Stone (Mark Linn-Baker) and Alan Swan (Peter O''Toole) about women in general in My Favorite Year (1982): - BenjyStone:''I don''t know what she wants.'' - Alan Swan:''Romance, Stone. That''s the only thing we can be sure they all want.''
Miles Monroe (Woody Allen) in Sleeper (1973): ''Ma, I''ve got-something to tell you. Arlene and I have to get a divorce . She thinks I''m a pervert because I drank our water bed .''
Allan Felix (Woody Allen) watching a dancer in a bar in Play It Again, Sam (1972): ''She''s a doll . I''d sell my mother to the Arabs for her.''
Waldo Lydecker (Clifton Webb) to Det. Mark McPherson (Dana Andrews) in Laura (1944): - Waldo: ''Did you ever know a woman who wasn''t a doll or a dame?'' - Mark: ''Yes, one, but she kept walking me past furniture windows to look at the parlor suites.''
''Suzanne sucks pussy! She''s a dyke . I know! I know! A lesbian! A lesbian! A lesbian!'' Reggie Dunlop in Slap Shot (1977)
Matt Nolan (James Cagney) in Taxi! (1932): ''I wouldn''t go-for that dame if she was the last woman on earth... and I''d just got out of the navy.''
Waldo Lydecker (Clifton Webb) to Det. Mark McPherson (Dana Andrews) in Laura (1944): - Waldo: ''Did you ever know a woman who wasn''t a doll or a dame?'' - Mark: ''Yes, one, but she kept walking me past furniture windows to look at the parlor suites.''
Nelson (Tim Robbins) and Mona (Jennifer Tilly) in No Small Affair (1984): - Nelson: ''Hey, Mona, what''s your bra size?'' - Mona: ''Multiply the length of your dick by ten and add your I.Q.'' - Nelson: ''Ask a simple question she gives you a math problem.''
Carolyn Burnham (Annette Bening) and Lester Burnham (Kevin Spacey) in American Beauty (1999): - Carolyn: ''Your father seems to think this type of behavior is something to be proud of.'' - Lester: ''And your mother seems to prefer I go-through life like a fucking prisoner while she keeps my dick in a mason jar under the sink.''
Stella (Thelma Ritter) and Jeff (James Stewart) in Rear Window (1954): - Stella: ''Maybe one day she''ll find her happiness.'' - Jeff: ''Yeah, some man will lose his.''
Sgt. Jack Colt (Emilio Estevez) reminiscing about his ex-partner in National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon I (1993): 'When Claire was excited she peed on my leg'. Jack Colt was very fond-of his ex-partner... a police dog named Claire.
Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey) and Fulton Greenwald (Ian McNeice) when the African tribes discover that their princess is no longer a virgin in Ace Ventura. When Nature Calls (1995): - Ace: ''What''s that they''re saying?'' - Fulton: ''Well, I think they''re saying she''s not a virgin .'' - Ace: ''They can tell that?''
The doctor and Charlotte Flax (Winona Ryder) in Mermaids (1990): - Doctor: ''Has your mother ever talked to you about sex?'' - Charlotte: ''Oh, yes . We talk about everything. She''s a wonderful mother .'' - Doctor: ''Why did you think you were pregnant? You''re still a virgin .''
China Doll Portland (Jean Harlow) to Alan Gaskell (Clark Gable) in China Seas (1935): ''I would have stood and fought back to back with you, but you taught me something I didn''t even know myself. When a woman can love a man right down to her fingertips, she can hate him the same way .''
Johnny Farrell (Glenn Ford) thinking of his ex-girlfriend Gilda (Rita Hayworth) now the wife of his boss in Gilda (1946):''I hated her so I couldn''t get her out of my mind for a minute. She was in the air I breathed and the food I ate.''
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): - Friend: ''Ah, Lady Lou, you''re a fine gal , a fine woman .'' - Lady Lou: ''One of the finest women that ever walked the streets .''
Oliver Webb (Walter Connelly) and Owen O''Malley (Roscoe Karns) speaking of director Oscar Jaffe''s (John Barrymore) obsession with stage star Lily Garland/Mildred Plotka (Carole Lombard) in Twentieth Century (1934): - Oliver:''Do you know how much he paid for long distance calls to Hollywood last year? Eighteen hundred bucks! And she hung-up-on him every time.'' - Owen:''In some Humpty Dumpty way that was true-love .''
Abe (Alan King) in Memories of Me (1988): ''At my age you worry about two things. One, you''re with a woman and she says, let''s do-it again right now, and the other is, who''s going to come to my funeral?''
Ned Ravine''s (Armand Assante) voice over commentary about Lola Cain (Sean Young) in Fatal Instinct (1993): ''Funny thing about women. They''ll do anything to keep up appearances. Take Lola Cain. She''d rather look like a hardcase with bloody knuckles than a soft touch with a soiled reputation . Still, I had to admit, there was something about her that made me sweat bullets .''
Laney Boggs (Rachael Cook) and Jesse Jackson (Elden Ratliff) in She''s All That (1999): - Laney Boggs: ''Screw the dolphins!'' - Jesse Jackson: ''A guy tried that last year, banned from Sea World for life .''
Garth Algar (Dana Carvey) in Wayne''s World (1992): ''That''s a babe! She makes me feel kind-a funny, like when we used to climb the rope in gym class.''
Wayne Campbell (Mike Myers) in Wayne''s World 2 (1993) ''Ah, Cassandra. What a babe . Schling! She''d give a dog a bone(r).''
''You know something? When a woman looks as pretty as sunup, then she''s really pretty.'' Ben Allison (Clark Gable) to Nella Turner (Jane Russell) in The Tall Men (1955)
''Don''t you know that a man being rich is like a girl being pretty. You might not marry a girl because she''s pretty but my goodness, doesn''t it help.'' Lorelei Lee (Marilyn Monroe) in Gentlemen Prefer Blondes (1953)
''I never knew a woman to look better in the morning than she does at night.'' Gay Langland (Clark Gable) to Roslyn Taber (Marilyn Monroe) in The Misfits (1961)
French author Franois Rabelais (1494-1553) (Translation by Sir Thomas Urquhart, 1653): ''These two did often do-the-two-backed-beast together in so far that at last she became great-with-child .''
Laney Boggs (Rachael Cook) and Jesse Jackson (Elden Ratliff) in She?s All That (1999): - Laney Boggs: ''Screw the dolphins!'' - Jesse Jackson: ''A guy tried that last year, banned from Sea World for life .''
''She turns over, peels off them orange pants, spreads her legs real wide and says to me: take a bite of peach!'' Sailor Ripley (Nicolas Cage) in Wild at Heart (1990)
Nelson (Tim Robbins) and Mona (Jennifer Tilly) in No Small Affair (1984): - Nelson: ''Hey, Mona, what''s your bra size?'' - Mona: ''Multiply the length of your dick by ten and add your I.Q.'' - Nelson: ''Ask a simple question she gives you a math problem.''
Nelson (Tim Robbins) and Mona (Jennifer Tilly) in No Small Affair (1984): - Nelson: ''Hey, Mona, what''s your bra size?'' - Mona: ''Multiply the length of your dick by ten and add your I.Q.'' - Nelson: ''Ask a simple question she gives you a math problem.''
Nelson (Tim Robbins) and Mona (Jennifer Tilly) in No Small Affair (1984): - Nelson: ''Hey, Mona, what''s your bra size?'' - Mona: ''Multiply the length of your dick by ten and add your I.Q.'' - Nelson: ''Ask a simple question she gives you a math problem.''
Nelson (Tim Robbins) and Mona (Jennifer Tilly) in No Small Affair (1984): - Nelson: ''Hey, Mona, what''s your bra size?'' - Mona: ''Multiply the length of your dick by ten and add your I.Q.'' - Nelson: ''Ask a simple question she gives you a math problem.''
Claude Eastman (Dudley Moore) and Norman Robbins (Albert Brooks) speaking of wives in general in Unfaithfully Yours (1983): - Claude: ''She is cute .'' - Norman: ''They''re all cute the first year.''
Alberta Marlow (Mary Astor) to Rick Leland (Humphrey Bogart) in Across the Pacific (1942): ''It''s true! Seeing me in pain gives you pleasure.'' But then she''s complaining about a mild sunburn.''
Horace Vandergelder (Paul Ford), at 65, plans to marry again in The Matchmaker (1958): 'I like my house run well, with order, comfort and economy. That's a woman's work . But even a woman can't do-it well if she's merely paid for it . In order to run a house well a woman must have the feeling that she owns it . So, marriage is a bribe to make a housekeeper think she's a householder.'
Amanda Penrose (Ann Sheridan) to Sylvia Fowler(Dolores Gray) in The Opposite Sex (1956): - Amanda : ''She''s a woman .'' - Sylvia: ''And what are we?'' - Amanda : ''Females. The lost-sex substituting fashion for passion and the analyst''s couch for the double bed .''
Grumpy (voice by Pinto Colvig) in SnowWhite and the Seven Dwarfs (1937): ''Angel! HA! She''s a female! And all females is poison! They''re full of wicked wiles!''
Zeke (Tully Marshall) to Breck Coleman (John Wayne) in The Big Trail (1931): 'Well, you can never tell how a woman feels by the way she acts. They're's all riddles all of 'em. And you just gotta guess 'em. And no matter which way you guess, you're wrong.'
Lisa Fremont (Grace Kelly) to Jeff/L.B. Jeffries (James Stewart) about Miss Torso, an attractive woman surrounded by men in Rear Window (1954): ''I''d say she''s doing a woman''s hardest job ; juggling wolves.''
Norma Lindt (Evelyn Ankers) and Ferdie Jones (Lou Costello) in Hold That Ghost (1941): - Norma: 'What happened to Camille?' - Ferdie: 'Me and her had a runaway marriage .' - Norma: 'A runaway marriage?' - Ferdie: 'Yeah. She got the marriage license and I run away.'
David Huxley (Cary Grant) and Susan Vance (Katharine Hepburn) speaking of David''s fiance in Bringing Up Baby (1938). - David: ''I bet Miss Swallow knows poison ivy when she sees it .'' - Susan: ''I bet poison ivy runs when it sees her.''
Garth Algar (Dana Carvey) in Wayne''s World (1992): ''That''s a babe! She makes me feel kind-a funny, like when we used to climb the rope in gym class.''
David Huxley (Cary Grant) and Susan Vance (Katharine Hepburn) speaking of David''s fiance in Bringing Up Baby (1938). - David: ''I bet Miss Swallow knows poison ivy when she sees it .'' - Susan: ''I bet poison ivy runs when it sees her.''
Chrissy (Rita Wilson) and Roberta (Rosie O'Donnell) looking at the magazine cover featuring Teeny Terrell (Melanie Griffith) in Now and Then (1995): - Chrissy: 'Now what is it that she has that gets people so excited?' - Roberta: 'Long legs, a tiny waist and perky breasts. '
Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey) to Fulton Greenwald (Ian McNeice) when the warring, rival tribes discover that the princess is no longer a virgin thanks to Ace Ventura. When Nature Calls (1995): - Ace: ''What''s that they''re saying?'' - Fulton: ''Well, I think they''re saying she''s not a virgin .'' - Ace: ''They can tell that?''
The doctor and Charlotte Flax (Winona Ryder) in Mermaids (1990): - Doctor: ''Has your mother ever talked to you about sex?'' - Charlotte: ''Oh, yes . We talk about everything. She''s a wonderful mother .'' - Doctor: ''Why did you think you were pregnant? You''re still a virgin .''
Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey) to Fulton Greenwald (Ian McNeice) when the warring, rival tribes discover that the princess is no longer a virgin thanks to Ace Ventura. When Nature Calls (1995): - Ace: ''What''s that they''re saying?'' - Fulton: ''Well, I think they''re saying she''s not a virgin .'' - Ace: ''They can tell that?''
The doctor and Charlotte Flax (Winona Ryder) in Mermaids (1990): - Doctor: ''Has your mother ever talked to you about sex?'' - Charlotte: ''Oh, yes . We talk about everything. She''s a wonderful mother .'' - Doctor: ''Why did you think you were pregnant? You''re still a virgin .''
John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester. A Ramble in St. James''s Park 1680: ''Had she picked out , to rub her arse on / Some stiff-pricked clown or well-hung parson.''
Mae West: ''An orgasm a day keeps the doctor away.'' As Mavis Arden in Go West, Young Man she said: ''A thrill a day keeps the chills away.''
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): - Friend: ''Ah, Lady Lou, you''re a fine gal , a fine woman .'' - Lady Lou: ''One of the finest women that ever walked the streets .''
''I would have stood and fought back to back with you, but you taught me something I didn''t even know myself. When a woman can love a man right down to her fingertips, she can hate him the same way .'' China Doll Portland (Jean Harlow) to Alan Gaskell (Clark Gable) in China Seas (1935)
Humorist James Thurber (1894-1961) rephrasing the clich: a woman''s place is in the home/kitchen: ''A woman''s place is in the wrong.'' Of course, as Lady Lou (Mae West) says in She Done Him Wrong (1933): ''When women go wrong, men go right after them.'' Mort Sahl also paraphrased the clich: ''A woman''s place is in the stove.'' Warrick (Sir Cedric Hardwicke) in Valley of the Sun (1942): ''The way to a woman''s heart is to get her out of the kitchen .''
George Bernard Shaw: ''It is assumed that a woman must wait motionless, until she is wooed. This is how the spider waits for the fly .''
Benjy Stone (Mark Linn-Baker) and Alan Swan (Peter O''Toole) about women in general in My Favorite Year (1982): - BenjyStone:''I don''t know what she wants.'' - Alan Swan:''Romance, Stone. That''s the only thing we can be sure they all want.''
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): - Friend: ''Ah, Lady Lou, you''re a fine gal , a fine woman .'' - Lady Lou: ''One of the finest women that ever walked the streets .''
''I would have stood and fought back to back with you, but you taught me something I didn''t even know myself. When a woman can love a man right down to her fingertips, she can hate him the same way .'' China Doll Portland (Jean Harlow) to Alan Gaskell (Clark Gable) in China Seas (1935)
George Bernard Shaw: ''It is assumed that a woman must wait motionless, until she is wooed. This is how the spider waits for the fly .''
Humorist James Thurber (1894-1961) rephrasing the clich: a woman''s place is in the home/kitchen: ''A woman''s place is in the wrong.'' Of course, as Lady Lou (Mae West) says in She Done Him Wrong (1933): ''When women go wrong, men go right after them.'' Mort Sahl also paraphrased the clich: ''A woman''s place is in the stove.'' Warrick (Sir Cedric Hardwicke) in Valley of the Sun (1942): ''The way to a woman''s heart is to get her out of the kitchen .''
Benjy Stone (Mark Linn-Baker) and Alan Swan (Peter O''Toole) about women in general in My Favorite Year (1982): - BenjyStone:''I don''t know what she wants.'' - Alan Swan:''Romance, Stone. That''s the only thing we can be sure they all want.''
Wayne Campbell (Mike Myers) about Cassandra (Tia Carrere) in Wayne''s World 2 (1993): ''Ah, Cassandra. What a babe . Schling! She''d give a dog a bone(r).''
''I would have stood and fought back to back with you, but you taught me something I didn''t even know myself. When a woman can love a man right down to her fingertips, she can hate him the same way .'' China Doll Portland (Jean Harlow) to Alan Gaskell (Clark Gable) in China Seas (1935)
Lady Lou (Mae West) in She Done Him Wrong (1933): - Friend: ''Ah, Lady Lou, you''re a fine gal , a fine woman .'' - Lady Lou: ''One of the finest women that ever walked the streets .''
Bill Reimers (Emilio Estevez) speaking of sobbing Gina Garrett (Rosie O''Donnell) in Another Stakeout (1993): ''Look at her. She''s doing the shoulder thing .''
Rhoda Philbrooke (Carole Lombard) in The Racketeer (1930): ''Don''t ask me why. Don''t ever ask a woman why she wants to cry. Just let her.''
Bill Reimers (Emilio Estevez) speaking of sobbing Gina Garrett (Rosie O''Donnell) in Another Stakeout (1993): ''Look at her. She''s doing the shoulder thing .''
Rhoda Philbrooke (Carole Lombard) in The Racketeer (1930): ''Don''t ask me why. Don''t ever ask a woman why she wants to cry. Just let her.''
Rhoda Philbrooke (Carole Lombard) in The Racketeer (1930): ''Don''t ask me why. Don''t ever ask a woman why she wants to cry. Just let her.''
Bill Reimers (Emilio Estevez) speaking of sobbing Gina Garrett (Rosie O''Donnell) in Another Stakeout (1993): ''Look at her. She''s doing the shoulder thing .''
Sir Guy Grand (Peter Sellers) to the Board of Directors in The Magic Christian (1969): ''May I take a page from our late great Rudy the Kip Kipling? Let our Kipling speak: There was a young lady from Exeter / All the young men threw their sex at her / Just to be rude / She lay in-the-nude / While her parrot, a pervert , took pecks at her.''
Miles Monroe (Woody Allen) in Sleeper (1973): ''Ma, I''ve got-something to tell you. Arlene and I have to get a divorce . She thinks I''m a pervert because I drank our water bed .''
Finn (Winona Ryder) to Marianna (Alfre Woodard) in How to Make an American Quilt (1995): 'You see , what they don't tell us is that marriage is this anachronistic institution created for the sole convenience of the father who needs to pass off his daughters to the care of another man . Like 'here, here, she eats too much. Take her off my hands', you know? But now, now that we've gotten our independence, that we earn our own livings, there's no purpose to being someone's wife . Why can't we love as many people as we want in a lifetime?'
Clarence Day (William Powell) having a father-to-son talk about women with Clarence, Jr. (Jimmy Lydon) in Life with Father (1947): - Clarence Sr.: ''All you have to do is be firm.'' - Clarence Jr.: ''Yes, but Father, what can you do when they cry?'' And later: ''You see Clarence, we men have to run this world and it''s not an easy job . It takes work and it takes thinking. A man has to reason things out . Now, you take a woman . A woman thinks... No, I''m wrong right there. A woman doesn''t think at all. She get''s stirred up .''
Clarence Day (William Powell) having a father-to-son talk about women with Clarence, Jr. (Jimmy Lydon) in Life with Father (1947): - Clarence Sr.: 'All you have to do is be firm.' - Clarence Jr.: 'Yes, but Father, what can you do when they cry?' And later: 'You see Clarence, we men have to run this world and it's not an easy job . It takes work and it takes thinking. A man has to reason things out . Now, you take a woman . A woman thinks... No, I'm wrong right there. A woman doesn't think at all. She get's stirred up .'
''You know , there''s nothing I like better than to meet a high-class mama that can snap back at you. Because the colder they are the hotter they get . That''s what I always say. Yes Sir! When a cold mama gets hot , boy! how she sizzles (...) Believe me sister, I could go-for you in a big way .'' Oscar ''One-On-The-Side'' Shapely (Roscoe Karns) to Ellie Andrews (Claudette Colbert) in It Happened One Night (1934)
Clarence Day (William Powell) having a father-to-son talk about women with Clarence, Jr. (Jimmy Lydon) in Life with Father (1947): - Clarence Sr.: 'All you have to do is be firm.' - Clarence Jr.: 'Yes, but Father, what can you do when they cry?' And later: 'You see Clarence, we men have to run this world and it's not an easy job . It takes work and it takes thinking. A man has to reason things out . Now, you take a woman . A woman thinks... No, I'm wrong right there. A woman doesn't think at all. She get's stirred up .'
Taylor (Mark Harmon) and Veronica (Madeleine Stowe) in Worth Winning (1989): - Taylor: ''Veronica, it is not real life , it is a fairy tale. Come on! Did you ever read The Frog Prince? In that one he''s staying a frog until she kisses him and brings him back to life .'' - Veronica : ''Yeah, well I kissed a lot of frogs and I haven''t met a prince yet.'' - Taylor: ''You''re kissing the wrong frogs. It''s hard to find the right person. It''s a search, a process. I don''t think it''s supposed to be easy.'' -Veronica: ''You know , some say you have to kiss a frog twice.''

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