balls:
1. Colloquialism for the testicles. Etymology: From ballocks ; dates as far back as William Shakespeare. Once spelled: bawls . See penis for synonyms.Quotes:
(1) Leticia Van Allen (Mae West) sponsoring a policemen's ball in Myra Breckinridge (1970): ' I've always adored policemens' balls. '
(2) Porn king Jerry Caesar (Dabney Coleman) to the Reverend Whirley (Christopher Plummer) in Dragnet (1987): ' Reverend, you've got balls as big as church bells .'
(3) Nick Conklin (Michael Douglas) explaining 'cops' instinct' to a Japanese detective Matsumoto (Ken Takakura) in Black Rain (1989): ' Sometimes you've got to forget your head and grab your balls .'
(4) Pedro (Peter Falk) in Tune In Tomorrow (1990): ' Does Pinocchio have wooden balls?'
(5) A sketch on The Pepsodent Show . (Bob's script called for a simple 'Okay'.)
-- Hedy Lamarr: 'I'll meet you in front of the pawn shop .'
-- Bob Hope: 'Okay, Dottie, and then you can kiss me under the balls .'
(6) Erica Benton (Jill Clayburgh) in An Unmarried Woman (1978): ' Balls! said the Queen. If I had 'em I'd be King .'
-- A rewording of: ' Balls! said the Queen. If I had two, I could be King .' ( If I had 'em I'd be king .)
-- George Burns: ' If my aunt had balls, shed be my uncle .'
(7) Jonathan (Jack Nicholson) speaking of Cindy (Rita Moreno) in Carnal Knowledge (1971): ' You know her problem? She wants balls .'
(8) Amber (Elisa Donovan), about tennis lessons, and Dionne (Stacey Nash) in Clueless (1995):
-- Amber: ' Miss Stoguer, my plastic surgeon doesn't want me doing any activity where balls fly at my face .'
-- Dionne: ' Well, there goes your social life .'
(10) Graffito: ' As a man grows old his balls grow cold .'
2. To have balls , to have courage, guts, or nerve, often recklessly so.
(1) Peggy Schuyler (Madolyn Smith) to Roger Cobb (Steve Martin) in All of Me (1984): ' It's either me or your balls, Roger. You can't have both .'
(2) Fast Eddie Felson (Paul Newman) to Vince (Tom Cruise) in The Color of Money (1986): ' You've got to have two things to win . You'ge got to have brains and you've got to have balls. You've got too much of one and not enough of the other .'
3. Balls! An expletive of surprise, annoyance or disbelief.
4. Balls! Or: Talking a load of balls! Rubbish; nonsense.
5. Balls-up , like fuck-up, mess up , screw-up , cock-up , a mixed up situation, a shambles.
See Also: all penis bondage, allsbay, ampailang, ampallang, anal violin, anatomically correct, Arabian Goggles, ass in a sling, ball, ball and chain, ball bag, ball basket, ball collar, ball restraint ring, ball sack, ball stretcher with chain, ball wracker, ball-breaker, ball-buster, ball-busting, ball-tearer, Ballarat, ballbag, balling the jack, ballroom, balls, balls and bat, balls in a sling, bannocks, bat and balls, bawls, bell dancing, Ben Wa Balls, bitch's Christmas, bitches' Christmas, blue balls, blueballs, bonking, BT, buff ball, buff ball and ballum rancum, bullets, buonballs, Burmese balls, C & B bondage, C & B play, C & B Torture, C and B torture, C/B/T/T, castrate, CB, CBB, CBT, CBTT, cobbler's awls, cobbler's stall, cobblers, cock and ball torture, cock harness, cock strap, cocksucker's teeth, coffee stalls, cojones, de-nut, desex, dish, dog with two dicks, driving range, eunuch, geisha balls, grow on, guy cramps, hand ball, have an affair with, Henry Halls, hot nuts, hot rocks, love nuts, marble halls, Max Walls, Niagara Falls, nobby halls, nut-cruncher, off, orchestra stalls, piles, poke, pounders, putter in the hole, queen's Christmas, Rino Tama, S & M, scrotum, slabs, stick and bangers, stone-ache, Thai beads, torture, vaginal balls, vogueing, Wentworth Falls
Quotes Containing balls:
Erica Benton (Jill Clayburgh) in An Unmarried Woman (1978): ''Balls! said the Queen. If I had ''em I''d be King. '' A rewording of: ''Balls! said the Queen. If I had two, I could be King. '' (If I had ''em I''d be king .) George Burns: ''If my aunt had balls , shed be my uncle .''
Pedro (Peter Falk) in Tune In Tomorrow (1990): ''Does Pinocchio have wooden balls?''
: ''It''s either me or your balls , Roger. You can''t have both.'' Peggy Schuyler (Madolyn Smith) to Roger Cobb (Steve Martin) in All of Me (1984). Roger is representing her father, his boss, in a divorce case : - Peggy:''Roger, you go to court tomorrow, we''re through!'' - Roger:''If I don''t, your father will have my balls .'' - Peggy:''Then it''s either me or your balls . You can''t have both!''
Graffito: ''As a man grows old his balls grow cold .''
Jonathan (Jack Nicholson) speaking of Cindy (Rita Moreno) in Carnal Knowledge (1971): ''You know her problem? She wants balls .''
Spike (Rhys Ifans) in Notting Hill (1999): ''I''m going to tell you a story that will make your balls shrink to the size of raisins.''
Porn king Jerry Caesar (Dabney Coleman) to the Reverend Whirley (Christopher Plummer) in Dragnet (1987): ''Reverend, you''ve got balls as big as church bells. ''
Leticia Van Allen (Mae West) sponsoring the policemens'' ball in Myra Breckinridge (1970): ''I''ve always adored policemens'' balls .''
Nick Conklin (Michael Douglas) explaining ''cops'' instinct'' to a Japanese detective Matsumoto (Ken Takakura) in Black Rain (1989): ''Sometimes you''ve got to forget your head and grab your balls .''
A pimp , Buchinski (Robert Hoy) to Dirty Harry/Harry Callahan (Clint Eastwood) in The Enforcer (1976): ''You can end up with your balls in spaghetti sauce .''
Keogh (Michael Caine) threatening to shoot a bad guy''s balls off in The Wilby Conspiracy (1974): ''Do you want to make your next statement in soprano?''
Joke: ''Hit the dude in the balls , then you''ll know if he''s S or M .'' (sadist or masochist)
Taffy (Mink Stole) in Female Trouble (1975): 'I wouldn't suck your lousy dick if I was suffocating and there was oxygen in your balls!'
Taffy (Mink Stole) in Female Trouble (1975): ''I wouldn''t suck your lousy dick if I was suffocating and there was oxygen in your balls!''
The Oracle to Neo (Keanu Reeves) in The Matrix (1999): 'Being the one is just like being in-love . No one can tell you you're in-love . You just know it , through and through, balls to bones .'
Duke (Jack Palance) to Mitch Robbins (Billy Crystal) in City Slickers II: The Legend of Curly''s Gold (1994): ''You ever talk to me like that again and I''ll turn your balls into earrings.''
A sketch on The Pepsodent Show. (Bob''s script called for a simple ''Okay''.) - Hedy Lamarr: ''I''ll meet you in front of the pawn shop.'' - Bob Hope: ''Okay, Dottie, and then you can kiss me under the balls .''
In Kiss of Death (1995): - Little Junior Brown: ''I got an acronym for myself. B-A-D. B-A-D. Balls, attitude, determination. You should get an acronym for yourself.'' - Jimmy Kilmartin: ''How about F-A-B .''
In Kiss of Death (1995): - Little Junior Brown: ''I got an acronym for myself. B-A-D. B-A-D. Balls, attitude, determination. You should get an acronym for yourself.'' - Jimmy Kilmartin: ''How about F-A-B .''
In Kiss of Death (1995): - Little Junior Brown: ''I got an acronym for myself. B-A-D. B-A-D. Balls, attitude, determination. You should get an acronym for yourself.'' - Jimmy Kilmartin: ''How about F-A-B .''
In Kiss of Death (1995): - Little Junior Brown: ''I got an acronym for myself. B-A-D. B-A-D. Balls, attitude, determination. You should get an acronym for yourself.'' - Jimmy Kilmartin: ''How about F-A-B .''
Peggy Schuyler (Madolyn Smith) to Roger Cobb (Steve Martin) in All of Me (1984): ''It''s either me or your balls , Roger. You can''t have both.''
Amber (Elisa Donovan), about tennis lessons, and Dionne (Stacey Nash) in Clueless (1995): - Amber: ''Miss Stoguer, my plastic surgeon doesn''t want me doing any activity where balls fly at my face .'' - Dionne: ''Well, there goes your social life .''
Fast Eddie Felson (Paul Newman) to Vince (Tom Cruise) in The Color of Money (1986): ''You''ve got to have two things to win . You''ge got to have brains and you''ve got to have balls . You''ve got too much of one and not enough of the other.''
Amber (Elisa Donovan) refusing tennis lessons, and Dionne (Stacey Nash) in Clueless (1995): - Amber: ''Miss Stoguer, my plastic surgeon doesn''t want me doing any activity where balls fly at my face .'' - Dionne: ''Well, there goes your social life .''
A short poem by Lou Perelli (Alan Arkin) and Ruben Martinez (Andy Garcia) for Judge W. Myers (David Ogden Stiers) in Steal Big, Steal Little (1995): ''May bleeding piles torment you and corns adorn your feet / And crabs as big as horse flies dig into your balls and eat / And when you''re old and weary and a siphilitic wreck / May you fall through your own bottom and break your bloody neck .''
''Now let me get this straight . You got a wife and you got a girlfriend in the office? Did you say your name was Bud or Stud? I''m sorry, but it sounds to me like you''re living your life so crooked you have to screw your socks on . Having an affair is like shooting pool on two tables. You may have the balls , Bud, but you''re gonna wear out your stick .'' Shirlee Kenyan (Dolly Parton) hosting a radio call-in show in Straight Talk (1992)
Does oat meal have lumps? = The Cheap Detective (1978) Does a hobby-horse have a wooden dick? = Road House (1989) Does Pinocchio have a wooden butt? = Earth Girls are Easy (1989) Does Pinocchio have wooden balls? = Tune In Tomorrow (1990) Does a frog have a waterproof ass? = Tune In Tomorrow (1990) Does a hobby-horse have a hickory dick? = The Cowboy Way (1994) Does Madonna take her clothes off? = With Honors (1994) Does the pope wear a beanie? = Off Beat (1986) Does the pope drive a Cadillac? = Beyond the Law (1994) Does a fat puppy hate fast cars? = Ernest Scared Stupid (1991) Does a one-legged duck swim in a circle? = Ernest Scared Stupid (1991) Does Veronica like Archie? = Little Giants (1995) Does Tina Turner wear a wig? = Earth Girls are Easy (1989) Do birds fly , do ducks duck? = Moonlighting (1985) Do flies fly , do spots beam up? = Moonlighting (1985) Do rattlesnakes kiss carefully? = Ernest Scared Stupid (1991) Do stripes suit a zebra? = The Matchmaker (1958) Is a pig's ass pork? = Gator (1976) Is a frog's ass water tight? = Big Business (1988) Is the earth flat? = The Flintstones (1994) Was Sergeant York's mother an angel = Nothing but Trouble (1991) Will a banker grope for money? = Nothing but Trouble (1991) Does Saddam Hussein and Omar Kadafi pull each other's toffee?'= With Honors (1994) OFF-SCREEN
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